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See first the merry P- comes
In haste without his garter.
Then lords and lordlings, 'squires and knights,
Wits, witlings, prigs, and peers : Garth at St. James's, and at White's,
Beats lip for volunteers.
What Fenton will not do, nor Gay,
Nor Congreve, Rowe, nor Stanyan, Tom Burnet or Tom D'Urfy may,
John Dunton, Steel, or any one.
If justice Philips' costive head
Some frigid rhymes disburses ; They shall like Persian tales be read,
And glad both babes and nurses.
Let Warwick's Muse with Ash-t join,
And Ozel's with lord Hervey's, Tickell and Addison combine,
And Pope translate with Jervis.
Who bows to every lady,
And be like Tate and Brady.
I pray, where can the hurt lie ?
As witness lady Wortley.
Review them and tell noses :
A strange metamorphosis;
A metamorphosis more strange
Than all his books can vapour “ To what (quoth 'squire) shall Ovid change ?"
Quoth Sandys, “ To waste paper.”
CLOSE to the best known author UMBRA sits, The constant index to all Button's wits. “ Who's here?” cries UMBRA: “only Johnson""O! “ Your slave,” and exit; but returns with Rowe: “Dear Rowe, let's sit and talk of tragedies :" Ere long Pope enters, and to Pope he flies. Then up comes Steele : he turns upon his heel, And in a moment fastens upon Steele ; But cries as soon, “ Dear Dick, I must be gone, “ For, if I know his tread, here's Addison.” Says Addison to Steele, “ 'Tis time to go :” Pope to the closer steps aside with Rowe. Poor UMBRA, left in this abandon’d pickle, E'en sits him down, and writes to honest Tickell.
Fool! 'tis in vain from wit to wit to roam ; Know, sense like charity “ begins at home.”
DUKE UPON DUKE.
AN EXCELLENT NEW BALLAD *.
TO THE TUNE OF CHEVY-CHAce.
TO lordlings proud I tune my lay,
Who feast in bow'r or hall:
That pride will have a fall.
Full plainly doth appear,
And Nic. of Lancastere.
When Richard Cæur de Lion reign’d,
(Which means a lion's heart) Like him his barons rag'd and roar'd:
Each play'd a lion's part.
* This very humourous ballad was occasioned by a quarrel between Nicholas lord Lechmere and sir John Guise, bart.Lord Lechmere had been representative in parliament for Cockermouth, and one of the managers against Sacheverell; he was an eminent lawyer, a staunch whig, and, having been removed from his office of. queen's counsel in June 1711, was a constant opposer of her ministry. He was appointed solicitor general in Oct. 1714; chancellor of the duchy court of Lancaster for life in June 1717 ; attorney-general in March 1717-18; and was created baron Lechmere of Evesham, Sept. 8, 1721 : dying June 18, 1727, the title became extinct.—Sir John Guise, who represented the county of Gloucester in several parliaments, died Nov. 6, 1732.
A word A word and blow was then enough:
Such honour did them prick,
And if your a-se, a kick.
At ev'ry turn fell to't ;
They fought from head to foot.
Stood paramount in pride;
His foes and friends beside.
Firm on his front his beaver sate;
So broad, it hit his chin;
And fear'd to tan his skin.
With Spanish wool he dy'd his cheek,
With essence oil'd his hair; No vixen civet cat so sweet,
Nor could so scratch and tear.
Right tall he made himself to show,
Though made full short by God: And when all other dukes did bow,
This duke did only nod.
Yet courteous, blithe, and debonnair,
To Guise's duke was he:
How could they disagree?
And cast how to requite him:
And, having no friend left but this,
He deem'd it meet to fight him. Forthwith he drench’d his desp’rate quill,
And thus he did indite : “ This eve at whisk ourself will play,
“ Sir duke! be here to night.” “ Ah no ! ah no!” the guileless Guise
Demurely did reply ; “ I cannot go, nor yet can stand,
“ So sore the gout have I.”
The duke in wrath callid for his steeds,
And fiercely drove them on;
O kingly Kensington !
Thrust out his lady dear :
And smote him on the ear.
But mark, how 'midst of victory
Fate plays her old dog trick!
And so down fell duke Nic.
Alas, O Nic. ! O Nic. alas !
Right did thy gossip call thee : As who should say, alas the day
When John of Guise shall maul thee !
For on thee did he clap his chair,
And on that chair did sit;
To do-what was not fit.