And heralds were sent, in his Majesty's name,

Through the length and the breadth of his realm to pro

claim

Personal safety, and I don't know what,

If only the man to the King could be got:

Well, the thief, with firm trust in his Majesty's honor,
Presented himself;-says the King, "You're a stunner:
I give you my own royal daughter to wife,

As the knowingest chap I have seen in my life;
For Egyptians are classed above all other men,
But I'm hanged if you ain't a cut above them."

JOHN SOUTH PHILLIPS.

THE ASTRONOMICAL ALDERMAN:

THE pedant or scholastikos became
The butt of all the Grecian jokes ;-
With us, poor Paddy bears the blame
Of blunders made by other folks;
Though we have certain civic sages
Termed Aldermen, who perpetrate
Bulls as legitimate and great,
As any that the classic pages
Of old Hierocles can show,
Or Mr. Miller's, commonly called Joe.

One of these turtle-eating men,
Not much excelling in his spelling,
When ridicule he meant to brave,

Said he was more PH. than N.

Meaning thereby, more phool than nave.

Though they who knew our cunning Thraso,
Pronounced it flattery to say so.

His Civic brethren to express

His "double, double, toil and trouble," And bustling, noisy emptiness,

Had christened him Sir Hubble Bubble.

This wight ventripotent was dining
Once at the Grocers' Hall, and lining

With calipee and calipash

That tomb omnivorous-his paunch,

Then on the launch

Inflicting many a horrid gash,
When having swallowed six or seven
Pounds, he fell into a mood.

Of such supreme beatitude,
That it reminded him of Heaven,
And he began with mighty bonhomie
To talk Astronomy.

"Sir," he exclaimed, between his bumpers,

66

Copernicus and Tycho-Brahe,

And all those chaps, have had their day; They've written monstrous lies, sir, thumpers!— Move round the sun?-it's talking treason; The earth stands still-it stands to reason.Round as a globe? stuff-humbug-fable! It's a flat sphere, like this here table, And the sun overhangs this sphere, Ay-just like that there chandelier.”

"But," quoth his neighbor, "when the sun From East to West his course has run,

How comes it that he shows his face
Next morning in his former place?"
"Ho! there's a pretty question, truly!”
Replied our wight, with an unruly
Burst of laughter and delight,

So much his triumph seemed to please him;

66

Why, blockhead! he goes back at night,
And that's the reason no one sees him!"

ELEGY.

TO THE MEMORY OF MISS EMILY KAY, COUSIN TO MISS ELLEN GEE, OF KEW, WHO DIED LATELY AT EWELL, AND WAS BURIED IN ESSEX.

"They fool me to the top of my bent."-SHAKSPEARE.

SAD nymphs of U L, U have much to cry for,
Sweet M LE K U never more shall C!

OS X maids! come hither and D, O,
With tearful I, this M T LE G.

Without X S she did X L alway,
Ah me! it truly vexes 1 2 C
How soon so D R a creature may D K,
And only leave behind X U V E!

Whate'er 10 to do she did discharge,
So that an N M E it might N DR:
Then why an S A write?—then why N,
Or with my briny tears B D U her B R?

When her Piano-40 she did press,

Such heavenly sounds did M N 8, that she
Knowing her Q, soon 1 U 2 confess
Her X LN C in an X T C.

Her hair was soft as silk, not Y RE,
It gave no Q, nor yet 2 P to view:
She was not handsome; shall I tell U Y?
UR 2 know her I was all S Q.

L 8 she was, and prattling like a J;
How little, M L E! did you 4 C,

The grave should soon M U R U, cold as clay,
And you shall cease to be an N T T!

While taking T at Q with L N G,

The M T grate she rose to put a:

Her clothes caught fire-no 1 again shall see
Poor M L E, who now is dead as Solon.

O LNG in vain you set at 0

GR and reproach for suffering her 2 B Thus sacrificed; to JL U should be brought, Or burnt U 02 B in FE G.

Sweet M LE K into S X they bore,

Taking good care the monument 2 Y 10, And as her tomb was much 2 low B 4,

They lately brought fresh bricks the walls to 10 (heighten.)

HORACE SMITH.

THE MERCHANT OF VENICE.

A LEGEND OF ITALY.

***Of the merchant of Venice there are two 4to editions in 1600, one by Heyes and the other by Roberts. The Duke of Devonshire and Lord Francis Egerton have copies of the edition by Heyes, and they vary importantly.

*** It must be acknowledged that this is a very easy and happy emendation, which does not admit of a moment's doubt or dispute. *** Readers in general are not at all aware of the nonsense they have in many cases been accustomed to receive as the genuine text of Shakspeare!

Reasons for a new edition of Shakspeare's Works by J. Payne Collier.

I BELIEVE there are few

But have heard of a Jew,

Named Shylock, of Venice, as arrant a "Screw"
In money transactions, as ever you knew;
An exorbitant miser, who never yet lent

A ducat at less than three hundred per cent.,
Insomuch that the veriest spendthrift in Venice,

Who'd take no more care of his pounds than his pen

nies,

When press'd for a loan at the very first sight

Of his terms, would back out, and take refuge in Flight.
It is not my purpose to pause and inquire

If he might not, in managing thus to retire,
Jump out of the frying-pan into the fire;
Suffice it, that folks would have nothing to do,
Who could possibly help it, with Shylock the Jew.