Then parables (for well he knew And, texts of scripture not a few, One afternoon in Easter tide, A sermon he would give, beside And preach he did with great applause The wily tempter's arch design, Ere long their eyes the audience clos'd, The drowsy pow'r-nay, Moses doz'd, No wonder they a nap should take: 'Twas then a meagre mouse that spent, Like famish'd anchorite, A tedious and abstemious lent, A wig it was, well dredg'd and basted; A mouse that had no victual tasted For weeks, might well allure, The very wig that Moses wore, He saw, and when he heard him snore, So forth with cautious tread he crept, And while its owner soundly slept, Now Satan some advantage gain'd, His mouse the people entertain'd-- Some laugh'd aloud-some forc'd a cough- But vain was ev'ry art essay'd, To make the robber flinch- At length the vicar, forc'd to pause, Of such a din and clatter. And starting round in wild amaze, The wig, which, focus-like, the Of ev'ry eye collected. rays With eyes uplifted, hands outstretch'd, And then a sullen groan he fetch'd, To ease his lab'ring breast "Why, Moses, Moses, man, a wake," Impatiently he cries; "Thy wig, thy Sunday-wig's at stake!"- The mouse, when sumptuously he'd fed, Upon his tour round Moses' head, And here and there stood loit'ring: Let fall his tail on Moses' chin, Just then he started, and he chopp'd, TINKER AND GLAZIER. HARRISON. TWO thirsty souls met on a sultry day, And as they swigg'd the happy, Tho' both agreed, 'tis said, That trade was wond'rous dead, They jok'd, sung, laugh'd, And were completely happy. The landlord's eye, bright as his sparkling ale, Had this blythe ending-" Bring us t'other mug!" The kettle gaily singing on the fire, Then puts the kettle on the fire again, As" trade's success!" he drinks, Nor doubts the wish'd success Tom will obtain. Our landlord ne'er could such a toast withstand: And drank-"Success to trade!" But, O, how pleasure vanish'd from his eye, He rav'd, he caper'd, and he swore, And curs'd the kettle bottom o'er and o'er. "Come, come!" says Dick, "fetch us, my friend, more ale; "All trades, you know, must.live: "Let's drink-May trade with none of us ne'er fail!? "The job to Tom then give; "And, for the ale he drinks, our lad of mettle, "Take my word for it, soon will mend your kettle." The landlord yields, but hopes 'tis no offence, To curse the trade that thrives at his expence. Tom undertakes the job, to work he goes, And just concludes it with the evening's close. Souls so congenial, had friends Tom and Dick, They might be fairly call'd brother and brother; Thought Tom, to serve my friend I know a trick, "And one good turn deserves another!" Out now he slyly slips, But not a word he said; The plot was in his head, And off he nimbly trips. Swift to a neighbouring church, his way he takes; Nor, in the dark, Misses his mark, But every pane of glass he quickly breaks. Back as he goes, His bosom glows, To think how great will be his friend Dick's joy Return'd, he, beckoning, draws his friend aside, And, to Dick's ear his mouth applied, Thus briefly states the case "Dick! I may give you joy, you're a made man, "I've done your business most complete, my friend; "I'm off! the devil catch me if he can, “Each window in the church you've got to mend; "Ingratitude's worst curse on my head fall, "If for your sake, I've not broke them all!" Tom, with surprize sees Dick turn pale, While horror in his ghastly face Dick's unknown smart, And two such phizzes ne'er met mortal view. At length, friend Dick his speech regain'd, "You have indeed my business done; "Tom! Tom! I am a ruin'd man. "Zounds! zounds! this friedship is a foolish act, “ You did did not know with the parish I contract; "Your wish to serve me, then will cost me dear, " I always mend those windows by the year.” |