As if he suddenly grew sick; And one rapid fiddle sets off express,— Hurrying, To fetch him a Doctor of Music. The cymbal Gets nimble, Must wrangle, The band is becoming most martial of bands, When just in the middle, A quakerly fiddle, Proposes a general shaking of hands! Quaking, Long bow-short bow-each bow drawing: The flageolet, To breathe "a piping time of peace." Like light'ning before death, For Scrapenberg to rest his arm, Again without remorse or pity, Up jumps a little man in black, "The very Devil can not stand!” And with that, Snatching hat, (Not his own,) Never, never, never more! Oh Music! praises thou hast had, A BLOW-UP. "Here we go up, up, up."-THE LAY OF THE FIRST MINSTREL. NEAR Battle, Mr. Peter Baker Was Powder-maker, Not Alderman Flower's flour,-the white that puffs And primes and loads heads bald, or gray, or chowder, Figgins and Higgins, Fippins, Filby, Crowder,— This stuff, as people know, is semper Like Honour that resents the gentlest taps, To make it, therefore, is a ticklish business, And sometimes gives both head and heart a dizzi ness, For as all human flash and fancy minders, There seldom is a mill without a blow But then the melancholy phrase to soften, 66 And advertised-than all Price Currents louder, Fragments look up-there is a rise in Powder,” So frequently, it caused the neighbours' wonder,— And certain people had the inhumanity To lay it all to Mr. Baker's vanity, That he might have to say - One day-so goes the tale, That was my Some ninny-hammer struck upon a nail,- At Cowes' Regatta, as I once observed, A pistol-shot made twenty vessels start; Think how this crash the human nerve unnerved. In fact, it was a very awful thing,— As people know that have been used to battle, The dunniest heard it—poor old Mr. F. Doubted for once if he was ever deaf; Through Tunbridge town it caused most strange alarms, Mr. and Mrs. Fogg, Who lived like cat and dog, Were shocked for once into each other's arms. And kicked the "Best of Parents" down the stairs: Miss Wiggins, with some grass upon her fork, He jerked his glass of Sherry in her face. Bobbed off her bran-new turban in the gravy; The nurse-maid telling little "Jack-a-Norey," Nor yet did matters any better go With Cook and Housemaid in the realms below; Grave Mr. Miles, the meekest of mankind, Struck all at once, deaf, stupid, dumb, and blind, Sat in his chaise some moments like a corse, Then coming to his mind, Was shocked to find, Only a pair of shafts without a horse. Out scrambled all the Misses from Miss Joy's! From Prospect House, for urchins small and big, Hearing the awful noise, Out rushed a flood of boys, Floating a man in black, without a wig;- But little Tiddy carried his big brother! The Tunbridge folks resolved that truth should dwell No longer secret in a Tunbridge Well, And packed it in a cart, Drawn by the horse that ran from Mr. Miles; And some few more, whose names would only vex, Now Mr. Baker's dwelling-house had pleased And for a time the deputies were teased, To find the noisy gentleman at home; At last they found him with undamaged skin, Safe at the Tunbridge Arms--not out--but Inn. |