and coachmen like coachmen they hold the reins, and like gentlemen overturn the carriage. It is difficult to say whether they make a better figure in the drawing-room or the stable. The Institution supplies them with the language of philosophy, and their servants instruct them in the cant of the turf. They are neither in full ner half dress, yet they profess to follow the fashion, and their models are to be seen in the press-yard of Newgate.

We have ladies that are neither chaste nor unchaste, but have hit the pleasing equivoque called the demirep -Having never been able to settle the boundaries of day and night, every thing is conducted between sleeping and waking; professions are made, and friendships formed, between jest and earnest.*

We have men of honour that vibrate between honesty and roguery-and men of spirit that are neither heroes nor cowards. We have bons vivans that are neither drunk nor sober, and just flustered enough to be troublesome.

The theatres reflect the manners of the times :—our plays are neither tragedies nor comedies; our comedies áre mongrels begot by operas on farces; our entertainments are between petites pieces and melodrams; and, if any regular fable be discoverable, it is in our pantomimes. The town is divided between Shakspeare and Mother Goose.

We have theatres starting up in every part of the town, that are neither regular nor irregular. We have concerts that are deserted only when they are public, and crowded when they are private. Ladies' houses áre places of amusement, and the established theatres are for select parties.

Dec. 8.

MEDIO TUTISSIMUS.

LINES

ADDRESSED TO MR. SHERIFF PHILLIPS, ON THE ESTABLISHMENT OF POOR-BOXES FOR THE UNFORTUNATE DEBTORS IN THE FLEET, AND OTHER AMELIORATIONS. EFFECTED БҮ HIM IN THE STATE OF THE PUBLIC PRISONS.

W

BY DR. BUSBY.

7HAT though you've vow'd yourself my friend,
Why did I on your smiles depend?

Why fondly dream a chosen few,

Alone, were dear, and lov'd by you?
'Tis clear we ne'er engross'd your heart,
That Mis'ry's victims held a part;
And you but wanted pow'r, to show
How wide its milky streams could flow.
The private hold, and public jail,

The Sheriff's name with blessings hail !
And our devoted friend we find

The common friend of human kind.
Queen Ann Street West.

HODGE AND THE DOCTOR.

[From the Morning Chronicle.]

WITH a big bottle nose, and an acre of chin,

His whole physiognomy ugly as sin,

With a huge grizzle wig, and triangular hat,
And a snuff-besmear'd handkerchief tred over that,
Doctor Bos, riding out on his old Rozinante,
In hair very rich, but in flesh very scanty,

Was a little alarm'd, out of fear for his bones,
Seeing Hodge cross the way with a barrow of stones:

Hip! friend," cried the Doctor, with no little force, "Do set down your barrow, you'll frighten my horse." Hodge quickly replied, as an Erskine or Garrow, "You're a curs'd deal more likely to frighten my larrow." Dec. 14.

FRENCH

FRENCH EMPIRE.

[From the Morning Herald.]

PROJECT OF A DECREE.

WE, Napoleon, by the Grace of God, &c. do de

cree, and have decreed as follows:

Art. 1. England shall cease to be a part of Europe. II. All Geographers, Cosmographers, Topographers, are ordered to conform to the present decree. All teachers of youth in the Prytanææums, Lyceums, and Central Schools, &c. shall instruct their pupils that the Britannic Isles no longer exist in Europe.

III. All English merchandise, and particularly journals, pamphlets, and books printed in England, are prohibited through the whole extent of the Continent of Europe, under the severest penalties. The importation of English ideas is equally prohibited.

IV. England having usurped the Sovereignty of the Seas, we forbid our subjects, and those of our allies, in future, the use of coffee, tea, chocolate, sugar, liqueurs, comfits, and sugared pastry; the wearing of muslins or calicoes; the use of bark, and other transatlantic drugs; and, finally, we for ever expel fevers and other maladies in which these drugs have been wont to be used,

V. When the wind shall blow from England, then all the Imperial Palaces on the Continent shall be protected by paravents, or wind-skreens.

VI. The Anglomania shall be punished as an encroachment on the liberty of the fashions, and the Continental Youth shall not henceforth dress à l'Angloise.

Given from our Palace of Fontainbleau, Nov. 20,

1807,

Dec, 12.

NAPOLEON..

THE

KING-MAKING.

[From the same.]

HE following Jeu d'Esprit has been eirculated on the Continent:

LETTER OF NAPOLEON BONAPARTE TO HIS BROTHER LUCIEN.

My dear Brother,

WHY will you persist in declining the title of Monsieur, my brother? Why, when crowns are raining down on the heads of all the family, do you continue unwilling to try one on? Doubt not that there will be found one to fit you, since there has been found one which sits perfectly well on the little Jerome. Play the child no longer; but be convinced that under existing circumstances there is nothing better for you than to be a King. What are you afraid of? Is it the toils of State? I will relieve you from them, for you shall only be employed to execute my orders. Is it the ridicule which is attached to the elevation of an upstart? Trust to my power and my insolence for your guarantee. Do you fear the poignard of your new subjects Begin by killing them, and they will not kill you. You see I explain myself with a frankness altogether fraternal. If at length you leave off this opposition to my wishes, and, to please me, consent in good time to take up the trade of King, to which you have such an ill-founded dislike, but which after all is not a bad thing, I will then give you those counsels which I shall enjoin you to follow, and which wẹ shall find to our mutual advantage..

1

Your brother Louis is always complaining of his kingdom as being too marshy and foggy, and that the air is bad for his health. He has a great longing for the kingdom of the Latins, which I had destined for you, not to put you too much out of your way. I have not yet, however, made up my mind on all this, and

as

as I shall soon have Spain and Portugal to dispose of, I postpone my determination till that moment, because I shall then have wherewith to content you all.

Enjoy, my dear Lucien, the repose which you love, till the proper time arrive. Ere long, called to a more noble destiny, you will display to the world a new sceptre, in the hands of a new Bonaparte. Then forget those arts which at present form your occupation, and devote yourself to those which you may learn by serving an apprenticeship to me. Exercise the arts of intimidating and oppressing mankind, by stifling their very murmurs-hæ tibi erunt artes. There will be nothing wanting to your happiness, if you add another still more essential, and that is the art of pleasing me. : Dec. 17 NAPOLEON.

MR. JOHN BULL TO " ALL THE TALENTS." [From the Morning Post.]

MY LORDS AND GENTLEMEN,

REALLY begin to lose my appetite for my roast beef and plum pudding, so much fretted am I by your scandalous and un-Englishmanlike behaviour. When you came into office I confess, I was very much rejoiced. We shall have at least, thinks I, an economical Ministry, and there will be an end of jobs; and then, with such a fund of talent, every plan must succeed; but, Lord bless my stupid head! never to be sure was a hope so completely disappointed: the first three months were employed in removing all the old servants of Government from their places, to make room for their own needy crew, and God knows mumerous and starving enough it was." Well," said I to Mrs. Bull, one morning as I was eating my muffin, and my daughter Jenny was reading to me some of the Ministerial appointments in the Gazette, "this does not altogether hit my fancy." However, I still hoped