THE CHANGELING BY THOMAS MIDDLETON AND WILLIAM ROWLEY DRAMATIS PERSONAE VERMANDERO, [governor of the castle of Alicant,] father | ANTONIO, the changeling. to Beatrice. FRANCISCUS, the counterfeit madman, DE FLORES, servant to Vermandero. Madmen. Servants. BEATRICE [-JOANNA], daughter to Vermandero. DIAPHANTA, her waiting-woman. ISABELLA, wife of Alibius. SCENE. - Alicant. ACT I [SCENE I.] 1 Enter ALSEMERO. Als. 'T was in the temple where I first beheld her, And now again the same what omen yet Enter JASPERINO. 5 10 1 A street. 2 Q. blest. 3 Cf. Macbeth, I. iii. Jas. Are you not well, sir? Als. way. What might be the cause? Lord, how violent 40 Violence? 'Tis but idleness compar'd A-going, man. Jas. Is this I'm all this while Enter Servants. Backwards, I think, sir. Look, 45 Your servants. 1 Ser. The seamen call; shall we board your trunks? Als. No, not to-day. Jas. 'Tis the critical day, it seems, and the sign in Aquarius. 51 2 Ser. We must not to sea to-day; this smoke will bring forth fire. Als. Keep all on shore; I do not know the end, Which needs I must do, of an affair in hand 55 Ere I can go to sea. 1 Ser. Well, your pleasure. 2 Ser. Let him e'en take his leisure too; we are safer on land. Exeunt Servants. Enter BEATRICE, DIAPHANTA, and Servants [ALSEMERO accosts BEATRICE and then kisses her]. Jas. [Aside.] How now? The laws of the Medes are chang'd sure; salute a woman! He kisses too; wonderful! Where learnt he [61 this? and does it perfectly too. In my conscience, he ne'er rehearst it before. Nay, go on; this will be stranger and better news at Valencia than if he had ransom'd half Greece from the Turk. 66 They can then check the eyes, and call them blind. loath'd: Als. But I am further, lady; yesterday Was mine eyes' employment, and hither now They brought my judgment, where are both 80 agreed. a cherry. Both houses then consenting, 'tis agreed; Beat. I am no enemy to any creature 85 My memory has, but yon gentleman. r. knew it. For five days past To be recall'd! Sure mine eyes were mistaken; This was the man was meant me. That he should come 1 Forestall. Mod. edd. stale. Q. or. 3 A fabulous animal said to kill with a glance. Q. And what. gether, and if it did not tame the maddest blood i' th' town for two hours after, I'll ne'er profess physic again. Ver. He's hot preparing for this day of triumph: Thou must be a bride within this sevennight. Als. [Aside.] Ha! Enter VERMANDERO and Servants. O Joanna, I came to meet thee. For this time, sir. Dia. A little poppy, sir, were good to cause you sleep. 155 Beat. Nay, good sir, be not so violent; with Jas. Poppy? I'll give thee a pop i' th' lips for that first, and begin there. Poppy is one simple indeed, and cuckoo (what-you-call 't) another. I'll discover no more now; another time I'll show thee all. speed 200 [Exit.] 160 I cannot render satisfaction Beat. My father, sir. Ver. Your devotion 's ended? Beat. find [Aside.) I shall change my saint, I fear me; I My affairs call on me. Als. A Valencian, sir. Ver. With any joy on earth. - Sir, your pardon ; 210 Had been a while with us in Alicant; I might have bid you to my daughter's wedding. 215 Als. [Aside.] He means to feast me, and poisons me beforehand. I should be dearly glad to be there, sir, 220 Beat. I shall be sorry if you be not there When it is done, sir; but not so suddenly. Ver. I tell you, sir, the gentleman's complete, A courtier and a gallant, enricht With many fair and noble ornaments; I would not change him for a son-in-law For any he in Spain, the proudest he, And we have great ones, that you know. Als. Ver. My best love bids you welcome. Beat. He was wont 235 He's much 185 Als. You went together in that, sir. Ver. No, by Saint Jacques, I came behind him; 190 Yet I've done somewhat too: an unhappy day Als. [Aside.] How shall I dare to venture in When he discharges murderers at the gate? But I must on, for back I cannot go. Beat. [Aside.] Not this serpent gone yet? Ver. [Drops a glove.] Look, girl, thy glove 's fallen. Stay, stay; De Flores, help a little. [Exeunt VERMANDERO, MERO, and Servants.] 230 ALSE De F. Here, lady. [Offers her the glove.] Beat. Mischief on your officious forwardness; Who bade you stoop? They touch my hand no more: There! For t' other's sake I part with this; [Takes off and throws down the other glove.] 1 Promontories'. * A coinage from the Greek meaning the first growth of the beard. * Trifling fancy. 4 Cannon. To watch her treadings, and in my absence Lol. I'll do my best, sir; yet surely 1 canest see who you should have cause to be jealous of. Alib. Thy reason for that, Lollio? It is A comfortable question. Lol. We have but two sorts of people in the house, and both under the whip, that's fools and madmen; the one has not wit enough to be knaves, and the other not knavery enough to be fools. Alib. Ay, those are all my patients, Lollio; I do profess the cure of either sort; My trade, my living 't is; I thrive by it; But here's the care that mixes with my thrift The daily visitants, that come to see My brain-sick patients, I would not have To see my wife. Gallants I do observe Of quick enticing eyes, rich in habits, Of stature and proportion very comely: These are most shrewd temptations, Lollio. Lol. They may be easily answered, sir; if they come to see the fools and madmen. you and I may serve the turn, and let my mis tress alone; she 's of neither sort. Alib. 'Tis a good ward; indeed, come they to see 10 Alib. Thou goest too fast, my Lollio. That knowledge I allow no man can be barr'd it; But there is a knowledge which is nearer, Deeper, and sweeter, Lollio. Lol. Well, sir, let us handle that between you and I. 15 Alib. 'T is that I go about, man. Lollio, My wife is young. Lol. So much the worse to be kept secret, sir. Alib. Why, now thou meet'st the substance of the point; I am old, Lollio. 20 Is on thee, and I account it firm and strong. Towards belly-hour, sir. Alib. Dinner-time? Thou mean'st twelve o'clock? Lol. Yes, sir, for every part has his hour: We wake at six and look about us, that's eye hour. at seven we should pray, that's knee-hour: at eight walk, that's leg-hour; at nine gather flowers and pluck a rose, that's nose-hour; at ten we drink, that's mouth-hour; at eleven lay about us for victuals, that's hand-hour; at twelve go to dinner, that's belly-hour. Alib. Profoundly, Lollio! It will be long Ere all thy scholars learn this lesson, and I did look to have a new one ent'red; - stay, I think my expectation is come home. Enter PEDRO, and ANTONIO [disguised] libr an idiot. Ped. Save you, sir; my business speaks itself: This sight takes off the labour of my tongue. Alib. Ay, ay, sir, it is plain enough, you 3 Skin. 2 A room in the house of Alibius. 3 Idiots. Guard (in fencing). (Dyce; "Pluck a rose" = alvum exonerare. (Buller [gives him money] but patterns to show you [95 of the whole pieces that will follow to you, beside the charge of diet, washing, and other necessaries, fully defrayed. Alib. Believe it, sir, there shall no care be wanting. Lol. Sir, an officer in this place may de- [100 serve something. The trouble will pass through my hands. Ped. 'Tis fit something should come to your hands then, sir. [Gives him money.] Lol. Yes, sir, 't is I must keep him sweet, [105 and read to him: what is his name? Ped. His name is Antonio; marry, we use but half to him, only Tony. Lol. Tony, Tony, 'tis enough, and a very good name for a fool. - What's your name, [110 Tony? Ant. He, he, he! well, I thank you, cousin; he, he, he! Lol. Good boy! hold up your head. - He can laugh; I perceive by that he is no beast. Ped. Well, sir, 115 If you can raise him but to any height, pains, And a great family might pray for you, 121 125 Lol. Nay, there's nobody doubted that; at first sight I knew him for a gentleman, he looks no other yet. Ped. Let him have good attendance and sweet lodging. Lol. As good as my mistress lies in, sir; [130 and as you allow us time and means, we can raise him to the higher degree of discretion. Ped. Nay, there shall no cost want, sir. Lol. He will hardly be stretcht up to the wit of a magnifico. 135 Ped. O no, that's not to be expected; far shorter will be enough. Lol. I'll warrant you I'll make him fit to bear office in five weeks; I'll undertake to wind him up to the wit of constable. 140 Ped. If it be lower than that, it might serve a fool, I had had more wit than I have too. Remember what state you found me in. Ped. I will, and so leave you. Your best cares, I beseech you. Erit PEDRO. Alib. Take you none with you, leave 'em [160 all with us. Ant. O, my cousin 's gone! cousin, cousin, O! Lol. Peace, peace, Tony; you must not cry, child, you must be whipt if you do; your cousin is here still; I am your cousin, Tony. 165 Ant. He, he! then I'll not cry, if thou be'st my cousin; he, he, he! Lol. I were best try his wit a little, that I may know what form to place him in. Alib. Ay, do, Lollio, do. 170 Lol. I must ask him easy questions at first. Tony, how many true fingers has a tailor on his right hand? Ant. As many as on his left, cousin. Lol. Good: and how many on both? 175 Ant. Two less than a deuce, cousin. Lol. Very well answered. I come to you again, cousin Tony; how many fools goes to a wise man? 160 Ant. Forty in a day sometimes, cousin. and go to a lawyer to be made friends. Lol. A parlons fool! he must sit in the fourth form at least. I perceive that. - I come [185 again, Tony; how many knaves make an honest man? Ant. I know not that, cousin. Lol. No, the question is too hard for you. I'll tell you, cousin; there's three knaves [190 may make an honest man, - a sergeant, a jailor, and a beadle; the sergeant catches him, the jailor holds him, and the beadle lashes him; and if he be not honest then, the hangman must cure him. Lol. Nay, you 're too forward there, Tony. Mark my question; how many fools and knaves are here; a fool before a knave, a fool behind a knave, between every two fools a knave; how many fools, how many knaves? Ant. I never learnt so far, cousin. 210 Alib. Thou puttest too hard questions to him, Lollio. Lol, Master, stand you next the fool. Lol. I'll make him understand it easily. Cousin, stand there. 215 Ant. Ay, cousin. Alib. Well, Lollio. there's a fool before a knave. Lol. Here's my place. Mark now, Tony, 1 Constable. 2 Answer for, warrant; or, make him able for. 3 Business. • Honest. Two. 220 |