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Hol. He draweth out the thread of his verbofity finer than the staple of his argument. I abhor such pha. natical phantasms, such infociable and point de vise companions; such rackers of orthography, as do speak dout fine, when he should say doubt, det, when he should pronounce debt; d, e, b, t; not d, e, t: he clepeth a calf, cauf: half, hauf: neighbour vocatur nebour ; neigh abbreviated ne: this is abominable, which we would call abhominable: (30) it insinuateth me of In. fanie: Ne intelligis, Domine, to make frantick, lunatick?
Nath. Laus deo, bone, intelligo.
Hol. Bone? bone, for benè ; Priscian a little fcratch'd ; 'twill serve.
Enter Armado, Moth and Costard.
(30) It infinuateth me of infamy: Nè intelligis, Domine, to make frantick, lunatick?
Narb. Laus Deo, bene intelligo.
Hel. Bome boon for boon Prescian; a little Scratch, 'twill Serve.] This Play is certainly none of the best in it felf, but the Editors have been so very happy in making it worse by their Indolence, that they have left me Augeas's Stable to cleanse : and a Man had need have the Strength of a Hercules to heave out all their Rubbish. But to Business; Why should Infamy be explain'd by making frantick, lunatick? It is plain and obvious that the Poet intended, the Pedant Tould coin an un. couth affected Word here, infanie from insania of the Latines. Then, what a Piece of unintelligible Jargon have these learned Criticks given us for Latine? I think, I may venture to affirm, I have restor’d the Passage to its true Purity.
Nath. Laus Dio, hone, intelligo. The Curate, addressing with Complaisance his brother Pedant, says, bone, to him, as we frequently in Terence find bene Vir; but the Pedant thinking, he had mistaken the Adverb, thus defcants on it. Bene bone
benè. Priscian a little firatcb'd: 'twill serve. Alluding to the common Phrase, Diminuis Prisciani caput, apply'd to such as speak false Latine,
Arm. Men of Peace, well encountred.
Moth. They have been at a great feast of languages, and stole the scraps.
Coft, O, they have liv'd long on the Alms-basket of words. I marvel, thy master hath not eaten thee for a word ;-for thou art not so long by the head as honorificabilitudinitatibus: thou art calier swallow'd than a flap dragon.
Motb. Peace, the peal begins.
Moth. Yes, yes, he teaches boys the horn-book : What is A B (pelt backward with a horn on his head?
Hol. Ba, pueritia, with a horn added.
Moth. Ba, moft filly sheep, with a horn. You hear his learning
Hol. Quis, quis, thou consonant ?
Moth. The third of the five vowels, if you repeat them ; or the fifth, if I. (31)
Hol. I will repeat them, a, e, I. Moth. The sheep; the other two concludes it, o, u. Arm. Now by the falt wave of the Mediterraneum, a sweet touch, a quick venew of wit; snip, snap, quick and home ; it rejoiceth my. intelle&t; true wit.
Moth. Offer'd by a child to an old man: which is wit old.
Hol. What is the figure? what is the figure ?
(31) Tbe last of tbe five Vowels, if you repeat them ; or the fifth if I : Hol. I will repeat them, a, e, I. Moth. Tbe Sbeep : the orber two concludes it out ] Wonder ful Sagacity again! All the Editions agree in this Reading ; but is not the last, and the fiftb, the same Vowel ? Tho'my Correction restores but a poor Conundrum, yet if it restores the Poet's Meaning, it is the Duty of an Editor to trace him in
whip about your infamy (32) circùm circa; a gigg of a cuckold's horn.
Coft. An' I had but one penny in the world, thou shouldst have it to buy ginger bread ; hold, there is the very remuneration I had of thy master, thou halfpenny purse of wit, thou pidgeon egg of discretion. O, that the heav'ns were fo pleased, that thou wert but my bastard ! what a joyful father wouldst thou make me? go to, thou haft it ad dunghill; at the fingers' ends, as they say.
Hol. Oh, I smell false latine, dunghill for unguem.
Arm. Arts man, præambula ; we will be fingled from the barbarous. Do you not educate youth at the chargehouse
of the mountain ? Hol. Or, Mons the hill. Arm. At your sweet pleasure, for the mountain. Hol. I do, sans question. Arm. Sir, it is the King's most sweet pleafure and affection, to congratulate the Princess at her Pavilion, in the posteriors of this day, which the rude multitude call the afternoon.
Hol. The posterior of the day, most generous Sir, is liable, congruent, and measurable for the afternoon: the word is well cull’d, choice, sweet, and apt, I do affure you, Sir, I do assure.
Arm. Sir, the King is a noble gentleman, and my familiar; I do assure ye, my very good friend ; for what is inward between us, let it pass I do beseech thee, remember thy curtefie I beseech thee, apparel thy head, and among other importunate and most serious designs, and of great import indeed too I but let that pass: for I must tell thee, it will please his Grace
his loweft Conceits. By, O, U, Motb would mean--- Oh, You, --i. e. You are the Sheep ftill, either way; no Matter, which of Us repeats them.
(32) I will whip about your Infamy unum cita ;] Here again all the Editions give us Jargon instead of Latine. But Morb would certainly mean, circùm circà : i. e. about and about : tho' it may be design'd, he Thould mistake the Terms
(by the world) sometime to lean upon my poor Moulder, and with his royal finger thus dally with my excrement, with my mustachio ; but sweet heart, let that pass. the world, I recount no fable ; some certain special honours it pleaseth his Greatness to impart to Armado, a soldier, a man of travel, that hath feen the world ; but let that pass-the very all of all is- but sweet heart, I do implore fecrecy - that the King would have me present the Princess (fweet chuck) with fome delightful ostentation, or show, or pageant, or antick, or fire-work. Now, understanding that the Curate and your sweet self are good at such eruptions, and sudden breaking out of mirth, (as it were) I have acquainted you withal, to the end to crave your assistance.
Hol. Sir, you shall present before her the nine Worthies. Sir, as concerning some entertainment of time, some show in the posterior of this day, to be rendred by our aslistants at the King's command, and this most gallant, illustrate and learned gentleman, before the Princess : I say, none' fo fit as to present the nine Worthies.
Nath. Where will you find men worthy enough to present them?
Hol. Joshua, your self; this gallant man, Judas Ma. cabeus; this swain (because of his great limb or joint) shall pass Pompey, the great; and the page, Hercules.
Arm. Pardon, Sir, error: he is not quantity enough for that Worthy's thumb; he is not so big as the end of his club.
Hol. Shall I have audience? he hall present Hercules in minority: his Enter and Exit shall be ftrangling a' snake; and I will have an apology for that purpose.
Moth. An excellent device: for if any of the au. dience hiss, you may cry ;
" well done, Hercules, now “ thou crushest the snake;' that is the way to make an offence gracious, tho* few have the grace to do it.
Arm. For the rest of the Worthies,-
Hol. Hol. We attend.
Arm. We will have, if this fadge not, an Antick. I beseech you, follow.
Hol. Via! good man Dull, thou haft spoken no word all this while.
Dull. Nor understood none neither, Sir.
Dull. I'll make one in a dance, or so: or I will play on the taber to the Worthies, and let them dance the hay. Hol. Moft dull, honest, Dull, to our Sport away.
SCENE, before the Princess's Pavilion,
Enter Princess, and Ladies.
If Fairings come thus plentifully in.
Rof. Madam, came nothing else along with That?
Ros. That was the way to make his God: head wax,
Cath. Ay, and a shrewd unhappy gallows too.
Cath. He made her melancholy, fad and heavy,