much Pains to expofe us.The little Difquiets and Uneafineffes of other Families are kept fecret; but here Quarrels are fomented, and afterwards induftriously made publickAnd you, Sir, you have done all this--you are my greatest Enemy. Maj. Your trueft Friend, Sifter.

Mrs. Oak. But it's no Wonder. You have no Feelings of Humanity, no Sense of Domestick Happiness, no Idea of Tenderness or Attachment to any Woman.

Maj. No Idea of Plague or Difquiet-No, noAnd yet I can love a Woman for all that

heartily As you fay, tenderly-But then I always chufe a Woman fhou'd fhew a little Love for me too.

Mrs. Oak. Cruel Infinuation !But I defy your Malice Mr. Oakly can have no Doubt of my Affection for him.

Maj. Nor I neither! and yet your Affection, fuch as it is, has all the evil Properties of Averfion. You abfolutely kill him with Kindness. Why, what a Life he leads! He ferves for nothing but a mere Whetstone of your Ill-humour. Mrs. Oak. Pray now, Sir!

Maj. The Violence of your Temper makes his House uncomfortable to him, poifons his Meals, and breaks his Rest.

Mrs. Oak. I beg, Major Oakly, that

Maj. This it is to have a Wife that doats upon one! The leaft Trifle kindles your Sufpicion; you take Fire in an Inftant, and fet the whole Family in a Blaze.

Mrs. Oak. This is beyond all Patience-No, Sir, 'tis you are the Incendiary. You are the Cause of I can't bear fuch-[Ready to weep.]-From this Inftant, Sir, I forbid you my Houfe. However Mr. Oakly may treat me himself, I'll never be made the Sport of all his infolent Relations.

[Exit.

Major Oakly, folus.

Yes, yes, I knew I fhould be turn'd out of Doors. There fhe goes-Back again to my Brother directly. Poor Gentleman!'Slife, if he was but half the Man that I am, I'd engage to keep her going to and fro all Day, like a Shuttlecock.

What Charles !

Enter Charles.

Char. O Major! Have you heard of what happened after I left you Yesterday?

Maj. Heard! Yes, yes, I have heard it plain enough. But poor Charles! Ha! ha! ha! What a Scene of Confufion! I wou'd give the World to have been there.

Char. And I wou'd give the World to have been any where else. Curfed Fortune !

Maj. To come in fo opportunely at the Tail of an Adventure!Was not your Mistress mighty glad to see you? You was very fond of her, I dare fay.

Char. I am upon the Rack. Who can tell what Rudenefs I might offer her? I can remember nothing I deferve to lose her—To make myself a Beaft!And at fuch a Time too !-O Fool! Fool! Fool!

Maj. Prithee, be quiet, Charles !-Never vex yourself about nothing; this will all be made up the first Time you fee her.

Char. I fhou'd dread to fee her-And yet the not knowing where she is, diftracts me-Her Father may force her to marry Sir Harry Beagle immediately.

Maj. Not he, I promise you. She'd run plum into your Arms firft, in spite of her Father's Teeth. Char. But then her Father's Violence, and the Mildness of her DifpofitionE 4

Maj.

Maj. Mildness!-Ridiculous!Trust to the Spirit of the Sex in her. I warrant you, like all the reft, fhe'll have Perverseness enough not to do as her Father would have her.

Char. Well-well-But then my Behaviour to her-To expofe myself in such a Condition to her again! The very Occafion of our former Quarrel!

Maj. Quarrel! ha! ha! ha! What fignifies a Quarrel with a Mistress? Why, the whole Affair of making Love, as they call it, is nothing but quarrelling and making it up again. They quarrel o'purpose to kifs and be Friends.

Char. Then indeed Things feemed to be taking a fortunate Turn-To renew our Difference at fuch a Time! Just when I had some Reason to hope for a Reconciliation!-May Wine be my Poifon if ever I am drunk again!

Maj. Ay, ay, fo every Man fays the next Morning.

Char. Where! where can fhe be? her Father wou'd hardly have carried her back to Lady Freelove's, and he has no House in Town himself, nor Sir Harry-I don't know what to think I'll go in Search of her, though I don't know where to direct myself.

Enter Servant.

Serv. A Gentleman, Sir, that calls himself Captain 'O Cutter defires to speak with you.

Char. Don't trouble me-I'll fee nobodyI'm not at home

Serv. The Gentleman fays he has very particu lar Bufinefs, and he muft fee you,

Char. What's his Name? Who did you say?
Serv. Captain 'O Cutter, Sir!

Char. Captain 'O Cutter! I never heard of him before. Do you know any Thing of him, Major?

Maj.

Maj. Not I-But you hear he has particular Bufinefs. I'll leave the Room.

Char. He can have no Bufinefs that need be

up.

a Secret to you.- -Defire the Captain to walk [Exit Servant.]-What would I give if this unknown Captain was to prove a Messenger from my Harriot!

'O Cut. Jontlemen, your Sarvant! Is either of your Names Charles Oakly, Efq.

Char. Charles Oakly, Sir, is my Name, if you have any Business with it.

'O Cut. Avaft, avaft, my Dear!-I have a little Business with your Name, but as I was to let nobody know it, I can't mention it, till you clear the Decks, fait.-[Pointing to the Major.]

Char. This Gentleman, Sir, is my most intimate Friend, and any Thing that concerns me may be mentioned before him.

'O Cut. O, if he's your Friend, my Dear, we may do all above board. It's only about your deciding a Deferance with my Lord Trinket. He wants to fhew you a little warm Work; and as I was fteering this Way, he defired me to fetch you this Letter. [Giving a Letter.

Maj. How, Sir, a Challenge!

'O Cut. Yes, fait, a Challenge. I am to be his Lordship's Second; and if you are fond of a hot Birth, and will come along with that Jontleman, we'll all go to it together, and make a little Line of Battle a-head of our own, my Dear!

Char. [Reading.] Ha! What's this? This may be useful. [Afide.

Maj. Sir, I am infinitely obliged to you-A rare Fellow this! [Afide.] Yes, yes, I'll meet all the good Company. I'll be there in my Waistcoat and

Pumps,

Pumps, and take a Morning's Breathing with
Are you very fond of Fighting? Sir.

you.

'O Cut. Indeed and I am. I love it better than falt Beef or Biscuit.

Maj. But pray, Sir, how are you interested in this Difference? Do you know what it is about? 'O Cut. O the Devil burn me, not I. What fignifies what it's about, you know? So we do but tilt a little.

Maj. What fight and not know for what?

'O Cut. When the Signal's out for engaging, what fignifies talking?

Maj. I fancy, Sir, a Duel is a common Breakfast with you. I'll warrant now, you have been engag'd in many fuch Affairs.

'O Cut. Upon my Shoul, and I have; Sea or Land, its all one to little Terence 'O Cutter-When I was laft in Dublin, I fought one Jontleman for cheating me out of a Toufand Pounds: I fought two of the Mermaid's Crew about Sally Mac-guire; tree about Politicks; and one about the Play-house in Smock-Alley. But upon my Fait! fince I am in England, I have done noting at all, at all.

Char. This is lucky-but my Transport will difcover me. [Afide.] Will you be fo kind, Sir, [To 'O Cutter.] as to make my Compliments to his Lordship, and affure him that I fhall do myself the Honour of waiting on him.

'O Cut. Indeed, and I will.Arrah, my Dear, won't you come too? [To Maj. Oakly.

Maj. Depend upon't. We'll go thro' the whole Exercife: Carte, Tierce, and Segoon, Captain!

Char. Now to get my Intelligence. [Afide.] I think the Time, Sir, his Lordship appoints, in his Letter, is-a

'O Cut. You fay right-Six o'clock.

Char. And the place-a-a-is-I think, behind Mantague House.

'O Cut.