My gentle sir, pray mitigate this spleen;

I sadly swear I meditate no crime

Against your dignity: I only mean

To save, if possible, to both some time;

To you in reading-me in making-rhyme.

Well!

you

ne'er saw the place; or, if

you

did,

'Twere better not too closely to surmise;

Enough for me, those frowns the thought forbid ; Who sees too much is rarely counted wise;

I rather boast that mine are prudent eyes;

Persons and things so quietly they read,

Nor by a glance confess they scrutinize,

That thoughtless lookers think me blind indeed,

When of themselves I take the strictest heed.

But, since you wish me to believe that college.
Ne'er gave its finish to your education,

I, of its laws and customs having knowledge,
Ere I take up the thread of my narration,

Must say a little for your information:

Unless the virtues of DAY-RULES you know,

Their use from Term's commencement to Vacation,

I should but vainly ask you to bestow
The slightest notice on the tale below.

Says common law "In fictione juris

Consistit æquitas;" as you may see

In Jacob's Grammar set; which to be sure is
But just to say, that law and equity,

Unless a lie unite them, don't agree.

Let Scarlet, or let Abbot's self defend

The practice founded thus; enough for me, This sapient maxim is the prisoner's friend, And necessary to my story's end.

Well-then-this fiction of the law supposes
That every prisoner with means to pay
(For he that has not, this advantage loses)
Either has business in the courts, or may.
Bond, fee, and sureties first prepare the way;
And Mister Brooshooft's manual sign declares
That Mister Such-an-one, on such a day,
Hath got a Rule of Court, and so repairs
To town, or elsewhere, call'd by his affairs.

This little talisman of strange effect

(Four shillings just, and sixpence, is the price)

From baliff's power the wearer will protect,

And nullify a capias in a trice:

It bears a royal head in quaint device,
At least as true as that which Wellesley Pole

With taste for English artists much too nice Stamped by Pistrucci's aid; Heaven rest his soul! And shield henceforth the Mint from his controul.

In various ways the various purchasers

That sally forth with this protecting spell, Employ the privilege this grant confers;

Some, like myself, their lawyer's citadel

Besiege, his speed long striving to impel;

To take a dinner with a friend some go;

In fashion's haunts some for an hour to swell;

Some strive, what creditors intend, to know;
And some the moments on their love bestow.

The custody of William Jones esquire,

That doughty marshal of terrific fame, 'Mid many prisoners held a youth of fire,

Whom scarce imprisonment itself could tame; We'll call him Lawless, if you like the name; "Twill answer just as well as if you knew

His own, his family, and whence he cameLast Easter term, the usual forms, passed thro', Procured a Day-rule, and away he flew.