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Mar. Yes, yes. It's safe enough. I have taken care of it. But how could you think the seat of a post-coach at an inn-door a place of safety? Ah, numbskull! I have taken better precautions for you than you did for yourself.

Hast. What!

-I have

Mar. I have sent it to the landlady to keep for you.

Hast. To the landlady!

Mar. The landlady.

Hast. You did.

Mar. I did. She's to be answerable for its forthcoming, you know.

Hast. Yes, she'll bring it forth, with a witness. Mar. Wasn't I right? I believe you'll allow that I acted prudently upon this occasion ?

Hast. [Aside] He must not see my uneasiness.

Mar. You seem a little disconcerted though, methinks. Sure nothing has happened!

Hast. No, nothing. Never was in better spirits in all my life. And so you left it with the landlady, who, no doubt, very readily undertook the charge?

Mar. Rather too readily. For she not only kept the casket; but, thro' her great precaution, was going to keep the messenger too. Ha! ha! ha!

Hast. He he he! They're safe however.
Mar. As a guinea in a miser's purse.

Hast. [Aside] So now all hopes of fortune are at an end, and we must set off without it. [To him] Well, Charles, I'll leave you to your meditations on

the pretty bar-maid, and, he! he he! may you be as successful for yourself as you have been for me.

[Exit Mar. Thank ye, George! I ask no more, Ha! ha ha!

Enter HARDCASTLE.

Hard. I no longer know my own house. It's turned all topsy-turvy. His servants have got drunk already. I'll bear it no longer, and yet, from my respect for his father, I'll be calm. [To him] Mr. Marlow, your servant. I'm your very humble [Bowing low. Mar. Sir, your humble servant. [Aside] What's to be the wonder now?

servant.

Hard. I believe, Sir, you must be sensible, Sir, that no man alive ought to be more welcome than your father's son, Sir. I hope you think so?

Mar. I do from my soul, Sir. I don't want much intreaty. I generally make my father's son welcome wherever he goes.

Hard. I believe you do, from my soul, Sir. But tho' I say nothing to your own conduct, that of your servants is insufferable. Their manner of drinking is setting a very bad example in this house, I assure

you.

Mar. I protest, my very good Sir, that's no fault of mine. If they don't drink as they ought they are to blame. I ordered them not to spare the cellar. I did, I assure you. [To the side scene] Here, let one

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of my servants come up. [To him] My positive directions were, that as I did not drink myself, they should make up for my deficiencies below.

Hard. Then they had your orders for what they do! I'm satisfied!

Mar. They had, I assure you. You shall hear from one of themselves.

Enter Servant drunk.

Mar. You, Jeremy! Come forward, sirrah! What were my orders? Were you not told to drink freely, and call for what you thought fit, for the good of the house?

Hard. [Aside] I begin to lose my patience.

Fer. Please your honour, liberty and Fleet-street for ever! Tho' I'm but a servant, I'm as good as another man. I'll drink for no man before supper, Sir, dammy! Good liquor will sit upon a good supper, but a good supper will not sit upon-hiccup upon my conscience, Sir.

Mar. You see, my old friend, the fellow is as drunk as he can possibly be. I don't know what you'd have more, unless you'd have the poor devil soused in a beer-barrel.

Hard. Zounds! He'll drive me distracted if I contain myself any longer. Mr. Marlow. Sir; I have submitted to your insolence for more than four hours, and I see no likelihood of its coming to an end. I'm now resolved to be master here, Sir, and I desire that

you and your drunken pack may leave my house directly.

Mar. Leave your house!-Sure you jest, my good friend? What, when I'm doing what I can to please

you.

Hard. I tell you, Sir, you don't please me; so I desire you'll leave my house.

Mar. Sure you cannot be serious? At this time o'night, and such a night. You only mean to banter

me?

Hard. I tell you, Sir, I'm serious; and, now that my passions are roused, I say this house is mine, Sir; this house is mine, and I command you to leave it di. rectly.

Mar. Ha ha ha! A puddle in a storm. I shan't stir a step, I assure you. [In a serious tone] This your house, fellow! It's my house. This is my house. Mine, while I choose to stay. What right have you to bid me leave this house, Sir? I never met with such impudence, curse me, never in my whole life before.

Hard. Nor I, confound me if ever I did. To come to my house, to call for what he likes, to turn me out of my own chair, to insult the family, to order his servants to get drunk, and then to tell me, This house is mine, Sir. By all that's impudent it makes me laugh. Ha! ha! ha! Pray, Sir, [bantering] as you take the house, what think you of taking the rest of the furniture? There's a pair of silver candlesticks, and there's a fire-screen, and here's a pair of braz

en nosed bellows, perhaps you may take a fancy to them?

Mar. Bring me your bill, Sir, bring me your bill, and let's make no more words about it.

Hard. There are a set of prints too. What think you of the rake's progress for your own apartment? Mar. Bring me your bill, I say; and I'll leave you and your infernal house directly.

Hard. Then there's a mahogany table, that you may see your own face in.

Mar. My bill, I say.

Hard. I had forgot the great chair, for your own particular slumbers, after a hearty meal.

Mar. Zounds! bring me my bill, I say, and let's hear no more on't.

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Hard. Young man, young man, from your father's letter to me, I was taught to expect a well-bred modest man, as a visiter here, but now I find him no better than a coxcomb and a bully; but he will be down here presently, and shall hear more of it.

[Exit.

Mar. How's this! Sure I have not mistaken the house! Every thing looks like an inn. The servants cry, coming. The attendance is awkward; the barmaid too to attend us. But she's here, and will further inform me. Whither so fast, child. A word

with you.

Enter Miss HARDCASTLE.

Miss Hard. Let it be short then. I'm in a hurry.

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