Mercy on me, exclaimed Susan, observing I had got it on the hind part before, why sir, what has betided you? have you been trying to get a fresh fit of the rheumatiz in your juglers: Í declare you frets me to the bone to see you so unprudent.

Never fear, replied I, I shall be wiser when I come back, for I will have a Donkey Tour to Brighton.

There's a great many asses there e'ent there, Sir? asked Susan. More than are requisite, replied I; but, for all that, I'll add one more to the number, for an ass I'll have, and that immediately; 'tis gentle wholesome exercise, and 'tis the fashion; come get me my hat, I'll be off to Smithfield, and make my market. Susan stood thunderstruck, What, you ride a-top of an ass, sir, lack-a-daisy, why, how the people will laugh at you, exclaimed she.

So I mean they shall, Susan; it won't be the first or second time they have laughed at me ; 'tis an honor I am very ambitious of I'm sure you'll look very queer, continued Susan, pouting her under lip.

I'm a queer man, said I, rather sharply, and therefore I like

to act queer.

I'm sorry for't sir, answered Susan, for I'm sure I sha'n't like to be axed about it a hundred times over.

Nobody ever axed you yet, said I.

What, do you think, sir, that people wont ar me about the ass, cried Susan, conscious of the truth of her assertion.

No, I'm sure they wont, replied I; for if any man living was to lift an axe against you, I'd knock him down: I'd chopper him, he should not axe you twice. I tell you what Susan, I sincerely wish, while I am gone to Brighton, that you would study meanings out of the old spelling-book in my closet, for you make me very angry to hear you talk nonsense.

La! sir, what odds! cried Susan, you're so particular about folks speaking extinctly, nobody won't eradicate by me, if I talked ever so fine.

So, finding I had affronted the old girl, I bolted off to Smithfield. Our facetious friend, who is so kindly anxious about the propriety of his waiting-woman's enunciation, and sets her so fine an example of grammatical discipline, never exchanging duty between was and were or putting adjectives upon adverb service; goes to Smithfield, sees a great many asses, does not give any of them macaroons, or break their halters; but purchases one, upon which he sets forth to make, not the best, but the most of his way to Brighton. Like other sentimental gentlemen, who ride about the country on purpose to look about them, and tell what they see, our tourist meets with all sorts of adventures, which ordinary travellers would be apt to pass by as

no adventures at all. He sees "Faggot Girls-Itinerant Tinkers-Pig-drivers-Tandems," &c. and moralises mightily about them all. Sometimes he is dissolved to tenderness, sometimes inflamed to enthusiasm, sometimes excited to waggery and jest. But we must do him the justice to say, that he is always goodtempered, disposed to please, and to be pleased; very humane, and distributes his eighteen-penny and three-shilling pieces with all the munificence of an electioneering candidate, and all the patient investigation of a Member of the Mendicant Society. It would be a fine thing for the cripples and orphans on the route between "town" and Brighton, if so kind-hearted a gentleman could be found travelling "up or down the road," every sun-shiny day throughout the season. We have heard it said of many sporting characters, that it would be a better thing to be their horses than their companions; and we are almost tempted to say that we had rather be the observant pedestrian's beggars than his readers. His imagery does not "beggar all description," but his descriptions are almost all of beggars; and his forte is most decidedly the profession of an almoner.

There is a passage in the true style of the licensed pedlars in the small wares of literature, which the author calls The Mushroom Picker. It begins thus:

She was scrambling upon her knees, and gathering the largest mushrooms I ever saw. A ragged basket stood by her side (amidst innumerable lumps of chalk, that had been scattered over the land,) but the basket was not half so ragged as the girl; for she had only a chemise, and about half a flannel petticoat, that displayed the calf of a ruddy leg, adorned by neither shoe or stocking, and her matted hair hung dishevelled round her face, unshaded by cap or bonnet.

"Poor wretched imp of misery," thought I, "is it thus thou earn'st thy daily crumb?" I stopped my donkey, &c.-Vol. I. p.

193.

May we never be so callous as to eat ketchup without a "glistening tear," in sympathy to this sensitive being, who was agonised at seeing a child whom he supposed to exist upon a crumb a day; who felt a double vibration on the drum of his ear, on being told of a poor woman's lying in; and sat petrified in the dog-days, on hearing of a family of eleven children,— whose very pocket-pieces had a benevolent physiognomy.

The air of Worthing seems to be highly impregnated with poetical inspiration. Our traveller no sooner scents it, than he

breaks out into a rhapsody, which wants only to be thrown into the present tense, and to have the sentences divided by dashesin the manner of his great prototype, to be as sublime as such a thing ought to be.-Vol. I. p. 233.

The joke of the axe, with which this traveller started, is by him thought so happy a one, that he brings it forward again at the beginning of the second volume, thrown into dialogue, accompanied with a clumsy explanation.

We lay aside this anomalous compound, bearing our testimony to its innoxious properties. It may be taken with safety, in as frequent doses, and as large quantities as the patient can bear; and, in cases of confirmed idleness, may form an useful article in the mental diet.

ART. VII. A Tale for Gentle and Simple. London, Hunter, 1815. pp. 456. 1 vol.

WE are told that this volume is " inscribed without permission to Miss Edgeworth, by a very sincere admirer." A departure from established forms in matters of ceremony, has never appeared to us indicative of sound discretion; and it is to the minutiæ of life that the precept to "think with the wise, and speak with the vulgar," is peculiarly adapted. Pretence and Folly may be shewn in the slope of a bow, or the sink of a courtesy; but neither Wit nor Genius can be displayed in these ordinary marks of civility, and the eye of a person of taste will turn with disgust from the oddity which excites the stare of fools. From the obvious inferiority of the preface to every other part of the work, we are inclined to suppose it the production of another pen; and must warn our readers not to prejudge the story from displeasure at the flippancy of the first address of the narrator. To us, an attempt to be jocular on one's first appearance before the tribunal of the public, appears as absurd, as it would be for a stranger on first entering an assembly, in which he was to be subjected to the test of a ballot for continuance in it, to begin with "How d'ye do my fine fellows? I'm vastly glad to see you!" Such familiarities grow out of intimacy, and rather as excrescences than fruit; and the attempt to engraft them upon the slender stem of young acquaintance, will generally cause it to wither and decay.

We pass by the first part of the preface, and give only that which refers to the author's general object.

I have been impelled to take up the pen by a wish

a hope.

—a view-and A wish, to make my experience of children in some degree useful in this educating age.

A view, to furnish an example in my foundling, of the good to be expected from giving a suitable education to a low-born child, taken into a gentleman's family.

And a hope that by throwing in some out-of-the way, though not unnatural characters, the amusing may give effect to the useful.

If my children are deemed natural, my heroine interesting, and my moral in-tructive, I shall have reached the height of my ambition. And if, by making my preface short, I obtain for it the rare advantage of being read, my satisfaction will be complete.

This book does what very few books or persons do; it realises the promise made at the outset, and may truly be called "A tale for Gentle and Simple ;" since by both classes it will be read with both pleasure and advantage. It inculcates just notions of piety and dependence on the will of the Supreme Being. By its morality and good sense it influences to virtuous exertion; and it displays considerable acuteness of observation on men and manners, in language, if not always elegant, yet constantly forcible and appropriate. It is wholly free from the most prevalent vices of style--pedantry, verbosity, and affectation; and it cannot be read without one's taking a deep interest in the serious passages, and paying the tribute of involuntary laughter to the scenes of humour.

In the second page we were rather startled by a metaphysical distinction between naughtiness and folly proceeding from the lips of a little boy of three years and a half old; and we could not help reverting to the verses gravely recorded by some of the biographers of Dr. Samuel Johnson, as having been made by him at that age; but which the sage of Litchfield fixed upon their real author-his father, who was, as he says, "a foolish old man, that is to say, foolish in talking of his children." This, we are happy to say, is however a solitary instance of precocity of reason among the children of the piece, who form a very natural and interesting groupe; and Mrs. Haywood, the pattern-mother, is not an instance of insipid, unattainable perfection, sermonizing à propos to every thing; but an affectionate rational parent, moving with steady perseverance towards a well-chosen aim; and rewarded by that success which seldom disappoints meritorious exertion.

Fame and Fortune, coy and capricious deities, fly the advances of their most ardent suitors; and sometimes lavish their favors on the negligent and unconscious; while Virtue repels not a steady and honorable courtship, at the same time that she exacts many sacrifices, and will not "unsought be won." In one part of the work, the long-pending question of the preference due to public or private education for boys, is amicably contested between Mr. and Mrs. Haywood. Of course, the tender mother adopts those views of the subject which Cowper has depicted in his Tirocinium, and we must confess that she seems to have the best of the argument; nevertheless, her husband remains in possession of the strong hold of experience, which is often found to weigh against the most promising theories. Few young persons ever read of the form of a republican government without admiration; or consider a monarchical form without reprobation of the system, and something like pity for the subjects. And yet the experience of ages has proved, that human nature is incapable of that degree of public virtue which the one supposes; and that the other, when accompanied with some checks, produces the greatest portion of good, while exposes to the smallest risk of evil.

it

We cannot help wishing that the scene of this story had not been laid in Yorkshire. The barbarous dialect of the West riding would mar the effect of the most pathetic tale that ever was invented and unless the author could engage his or her readers to take lessons of Mr. Emery, we despair of the pages exhibiting "one made vocal for the amusement of the rest."

:

The ejaculations of Callum Beg are smooth reading compared to the beloike's-noa-noa's—and soa's-coorne's and meanwhile's of the plebeians of the piece. But whatever trivial dissatisfaction may be excited by these local peculiarities, it will be compensated by the drollery and naturalness of the inimitable Sir Thomas Upland. From among several whimsical scenes created by the well-meaning baronet's bustling activity, in doing and saying the right thing at the wrong time, and to the wrong person, we select the account of part of a visit paid to him by the patrons of the little heroine of the story.

Sir Thomas, upon alighting from the barouche-box, was informed of the arrival of a regiment of dragoons in quarters at New Matton. He knew that the band belonging to it was remarkably fine. "Gadso! this is good news, indeed!" cried he, “now we zan have music from morning till night."

So he forthwith dispatched a messenger, with an invitation to the