Act V. men. Here's Agamemnon,-an honest fellow enough, and one that loves quails*; but he has not so much brain as ear-wax: And the goodly transformation of Jupiter there, his brother, the bull,-the primitive statue, and oblique memorial of cuckolds t; a thrifty shoeing-horn in a chain, hanging at his brother's leg, -to what form, but that he is, should wit larded with malice, and malice forced with wit, turn him to? To an ass, were nothing; he is both ass and ox: to an ox, were nothing; he is both ox and ass. To be a dog, a mule, a cat, a fitchew§, a toad, a lizard, an owl, a puttock, or a herring without a roe, I would not care: but to be Menelaus,-I would conspire against destiny. Ask me not what I would be, if I were not Thersites; for I care not to be the louse of a lazar, so I were not Menelaus.Hey day! spirits and fires! Enter Hector, Troilus, Ajax, Agamemnon, Ulysses, Agam. We go wrong, we go wrong. There, where we see the lights. Hect. No, yonder 'tis; I trouble you. Here comes himself to guide you. Ajax. No, not a whit. Ulyss. Enter Achilles. Achil. Welcome, brave Hector; welcome, princes all. Agam. So now, fair prince of Troy, I bid good night. Ajax commands the guard to tend on you. Hect. Thanks, and good night, to the Greeks' ge Hect. Good night, sweet Menelaus. Ther. Sweet draught: Sweet, quoth 'a! sweet sink, sweet sewer. Achil. Good night, And welcome, both to those that go, or tarry. [Exeunt Agamemnon and Menelaus. Achil. Old Nestor tarries; and you too, Diomed, Keep Hector company an hour or two. Dio. I cannot, lord; I have important business, The tide whereof is now.-Good night, great Hector. Hect. Give me your hand. Ulyss. To Calchas' tent; I'll keep you company. Follow his torch, he goes [Aside to Troilus. And so good night. Tro. Sweet sir, you honour me. Hect. [Exit Diomed; Ulysses and Troilus following. Achil. Come, come, enter my tent. [Exeunt Achilles, Hector, Ajax, and Nestor. Ther. That same Diomed's a false-hearted rogue, a most unjust knave; I will no more trust him when he leers, than I will a serpent when he hisses: he will spend his mouth, and promise, like Brabler the hound; but when he performs, astronomers foretell it; it is prodigious †, there will come some change; the sun borrows of the moon, when Diomed keeps his word. I will rather leave to see Hector, than not to dog him: they say, he keeps a Trojan drab, and uses the traitor Calchas' tent: I'll after. -Nothing but lechery! all incontinent varlets! [Exit. • Privy. Portentous, ominous, SCENE II. The same. Before Calchas's tent. Enter Diomedes. Dio. What, are you up here, ho? speak. Dio. Diomed.-Calchas, I think.-Where's your daughter? Cal. [Within.] She comes to you. Enter Troilus and Ulysses, at a distance; after them Thersites. Ulyss. Stand where the torch may not discover us. Enter Cressida. Tro. Cressid come forth to him! Dio. How now, my charge? Cres. Now, my sweet guardian!-Hark! a word with you. Tro. Yea, so familiar! [Whispers. Ulyss. She will sing any man at first sight. Ther. And any man may sing her, if he can take her cliff*; she's noted. Dio. Will you remember? Nay, but do then; And let your mind be coupled with your words. Tro. What should she remember? Ulyss. List! Cres. Sweet honey Greek, tempt me no more to folly. * Key. Ther. Roguery! Dio. Nay, then, Cres. I'll tell you what: Dio. Pho! pho! come, tell a pin: You are for sworn. Cres. In faith, I cannot: What would you have me do? Ther. A juggling trick, to be-secretly open. Dio. What did you swear you would bestow on me? Cres. I pr'ythee, do not hold me to mine oath; Bid me do any thing but that, sweet Greek. Dio. Good night. Tro. Ulyss. Cres. Hold, patience! How now, Trojan? Diomed, Dio. No, no, good night: I'll be your fool no more. Tro. Thy better must. Cres. Hark! one word in your ear. Tro. O plague and madness! Ulyss. You are mov'd, prince; let us depart, I pray you, Lest your displeasure should enlarge itself Ulyss. You flow to great destruction; come, my lord. Now, good my lord, go off: You have not patience; come. Tro. I pr'ythee, stay. Ulyss. Tro. I pray you, stay; by hell, and all hell's tor Tro. By Jove, I will be patient. Cres. Guardian!-why, Greek! Dio. Pho, pho! adieu; you palter*. Cres. In faith, I do not; come hither once again. Ulyss. You shake, my lord, at something; will you go? You will break out. Tro. Ulyss. She strokes his cheek! Come, come. Tro. Nay, stay; by Jove, I will not speak a word: There is between my will and all offences, A guard of patience :-stay a little while. Fry, Ther. How the devil luxury, with his fat rump and potatoe finger, tickles these together! lechery, fry! Dio. But will you then? Cres. In faith, I will, la; never trust me else. Ulyss. You have sworn patience. Tro. [Erit. Fear me not, my lord ; I will not be myself, nor have cognitiont Re-enter Cressida. Ther. Now the pledge; now, now, now! Tro. O beauty! where's thy faith? Ulyss. My lord, Tro. I will be patient; outwardly I will. Cres. You look upon that sleeve; Behold it well.He loved me-O false wench!-Give't me again. Dio. Who was't? Cres. No matter, now I hav't again. I will not meet with you to-morrow night: |