would as soon have shot my own soul as have fired at the door.---But how could I tell who was within side?"--" That is the very thing of which I complain," said his lordship.

His candid opponent promised never more to be guilty of such a practical bull.

II.

AN old gentleman having occasion for a footman, desired his nephew to look out for one; and as he could not find any other whom he thought would suit him, he desired his own to hire himself to his uncle. The man, who revered his young master, reluctantly quitted him; but being persuaded it would be for his advantage, he repaired to the old gentleman, who being confident that his nephew would not recommend him an improper person, only asked him, if he understood sequences. "I do not know, Sir," replied the man; but if youL will be pleased to explain yourself, I hope I shall be able to give you satisfaction."--"I mean,” said the old gentleman, "that when I order you to lay the cloth, you should understand by it all the things connected with it, as the knives, forks, salt, spoons, &c. &c. And so upon all occasions, not to do barely what you are bid, by word of mouth, but to think of the con-sequences, sequences or dependences of one thing upon another "

The man assured him that he had not the least doubt of pleasing him: accordingly he was hired, and for some time they agreed perfectly well, but at last his master finding himself suddenly ill, one morning ordered him to fetch a nurse as soon as possible. Instead of returning with speed, he was absent for several hours; and the moment he came into his master's presence, he severely reprimanded him for staying so long away, when he had sent him on business that required dispatch. The arch, fellow waited till the old gentleman's passion was

abated, and then proceeded to justify his conduct in the following manner: "That he went and found the nurse, who was below that thinking the consequence of a nurse might be an apothecary, he had been for one, who was also below: that knowing a doctor always followed an apothecary, he had likewise fetched a physician, who was in waiting. A surgeon was often, he said, the sequence to a doctor, and an undertaker the consequence of all: he had therefore brought them, and hoped he had thoroughly understood his orders." The old gentleman was so pleased with the humour of the man, that he ordered him to fetch a lawyer to make a codicil to his will, by which he left him a valuable legacy.

III.

ON a trial at the Admiralty sessions for shooting a seaman, the counsel for the crown asked one of the witnesses, whether he was for the plaintiff or defendant?" Plaintiff or defendant! says the sailor, scratching his head: "why, I don't know what you mean by plaintiff or defendant. I come to speak for that man there!" pointing at the prisoner. "You are a pretty fellow for a witness," says the counsel, "not to know what plaintiff or defendant means."--Some time after being asked by the same counsel what part of the ship he was in at the time-"Abaft the binnacle, my lord," says the sailor.

Abaft the binnacle !" replied the barrister: "what part of the ship is that?"---" An't you a pretty fellow for a counsellor," said the sailor, pointing archly at him with his finger, "not to know what abaft the binnacle is ?"

CRAZY JANE.

WHY, fair maid, in ev'ry feature,
Are such signs of fear express'd?

The lowing herds now quit the lawn,
The lark springs from the corn;
Dogs, huntsmen round the window throng,
Fleet Towler leads the cry,
Arise the burden of my song,

This day a stag must die.

With a hey, ho, chevy,

Hark forward, hark forward, tantivy,

Hark, hark, tantivy,

This day a stag must die.

The cordial takes its merry round,
The laugh and joke prevail,
The huntsman blows a jovial sound,
The dogs snuff up the gale;
The upland winds they sweep along,
O'er fields, thro' brakes they fly,
The game is rous'd too true the song,
This day a stag must die.

With a hey, ho, &s.

Poor stag, the dogs thy haunches gore,
The tears run down thy face,

The huntsman's pleasure is no more,
His joys were in the chace;

Alike the generous sportsman burns,
To win the blooming fair,

But yet he honours each by turns,
They each become his care.

With a hey, ho, &c.

BRITANNIA AT NELSON'S TOMB.

PALE and languid sat Britannia,
Reclining o'er her Nelson's urn,
In vest of mourning, still indulging
Tears that scald, and sighs that burn!

For he, in whom her heart delighted,
Whose name was terror to the foe,

Tho', like the sun, he set in glory,
Wak'd her inmost soul to woe.

Alas! bereav'd of such a treasure,
Deep she felt the sense of pain;
Future blessings nothing mov'd her---
Consolation was in vain.

In softest whispers Hope presented
Other Nelsons to her view,
With laurel'd trophies, splendid honors,
Bright as fancy ever drew.

Still undiminish'd was her sorrow,
No words reliev'd her ardent pain:
Till, after hours of speechless anguish,
Thus she mourn'd her hero slain...

AIR.

Hero of Ocean's tide,
Is then thy spirit fled?
Rests then Britannia's pride
Among th' illustrious dead!.
For thee she heaves the sigh,
For thee she drops the tear;`.
But while the god of day
Illumes the rolling year,
Till time be pass'd away,
Thy name shall never die!

**

SONG.

A BLACKSMITH, you'll own, is so clever,
And great in the world is his place,
And the reason I've guess'd, why for ever,
A blacksmith's deserving of grace.
Creat lawyers who plead and who preach,
While many good causes they mar,