THE EFFECTS OF HOPEFUL'S CONVERSION. 165 will accept it for his salvation, and be thankful. And now was my heart full of joy, mine eyes full of tears, and mine affections running over with love to the name, people, and ways of Jesus Christ. CHR. This was a revelation of Christ to your soul indeed; but tell me particularly what effect this had upon your spirit. HOPE. It made me see that all the world, notwithstanding all the righteousness thereof, is in a state of condemnation. It made me see that God the Father, though He be just, can justly justify the coming sinner. It made me greatly ashamed of the vileness of my former life, and confounded me with the sense of mine own ignorance; for there never came thought into my heart before now that showed me so the beauty of Jesus Christ. It made me love a holy life, and long to do something for the honour and glory of the name of the Lord Jesus; yea, I thought, that had I now a thousand gallons of blood in my body, I could spill it all for the sake of the Lord Jesus. I saw then in my dream, that Hopeful looked back and saw Ignorance, whom they had left behind, coming after. "Look," said he to Christian, "how far yonder youngster loitereth behind." CHR. Ay, ay, I see him; he careth not for our company. HOPE. But I trow it would not have hurt him had he kept pace with us hitherto. CHR. That is true; but I warrant you he thinketh otherwise, HOPE. That, I think, he doth; but, however, let us tarry for him. So they did. Then Christian said to him, "Come away, man, why do you stay so behind ?" IGNOR. I take my pleasure in walking alone, even more a great deal than in company, unless I like it the better. Then said Christian to Hopeful (but softly), "Did I not tell you he cared not for our company? But, however," said he, "come up, and let us talk away the time in this solitary place." Then directing his speech to Ignorance, he said, "Come, how do you? How stands it between God and your soul now?" IGNOR. I hope well; for I am always full of good emotions, that come into my mind to comfort me as I walk. CHR. What good emotions? pray tell us. IGNOR. Why, I think of God and heaven. CHR. So do the devils and damned souls. IGNOR. But I think of them, and desire them. CHR. So do many that are never likely to come there. "The soul of the sluggard desireth, and hath nothing." • IGNOR. But I think of them, and leave all for them. CHR. That I doubt; for leaving all is a hard matter; yea, a harder matter than many are aware of. But why, or by what, art thou persuaded that thou hast left all for God and heaven? IGNOR. My heart tells me so. - CHR. The wise man says, "He that trusteth in his own heart is a fool." CHRISTIAN AND IGNORANCE CONVERSE. 167 IGNOR. This is spoken of an evil heart, but mine is a good one. CHR. But how dost thou prove that? IGNOR. It comforts me in hopes of heaven. CHR. That may be through its deceitfulness; for a man's heart may minister comfort to him in the hopes of that thing for which he yet has no ground to hope. IGNOR, But my heart and life agree together, and therefore my hope is well grounded. CHR. Who told thee that thy heart and life agree together? IGNOR. My heart tells me so. CHR. Ask my fellow if I be a thief. Thy heart tells thee so. Except the Word of God beareth witness in this matter, other testimony is of no value. IGNOR. But is it not a good heart that has good thoughts? and is not that a good life that is according to God's commandments? CHR. Yes, that is a good heart that hath good thoughts, and that is a good life that is according to God's commandments; but it is one thing indeed to have these, and another thing only to think so. IGNOR. Pray what count you good thoughts, and a life according to God's commandments? CHR. There are good thoughts of divers kinds: some respecting ourselves, some God, some Christ, and some other things. IGNOR. What be good thoughts respecting ourselves? CHR. Such as agree with the Word of God. IGNOR. When do our thoughts of ourselves agree with the Word of God? CHR. When we pass the same judgment upon ourselves which the Word passes. To explain myself-the Word of God saith of persons in a natural condition, "There is none, righteous, there is none that doeth good." It saith also, that every imagination of the heart of man is only evil, and that continually. And again, "The imagination of man's heart is evil from his youth." Now then, when we think, thus of ourselves, having sense thereof, then are our thoughts good ones, because according to the Word of God. s IGNOR. I will never believe that my heart is thus bad. CHR. Therefore thou never hadst one good thought con-f cerning thyself in thy life. But let me go on. As the Word passeth a judgment upon our HEART, so it passeth a judgment upon our WAYS; and when our thoughts of our HEARTS and WAYS agree with the judgment which the Word giveth of both, then are both good, because agreeing theretoIGNOR. Make out your meaning. CHR. Why, the Word of God saith that man's ways are crooked ways; not good, but perverse. It saith they are naturally out of the good way, that they have not known it. Now, when a man thus thinketh of his ways, I say, when he doth sensibly, and with heart-humiliation, thus think, then hath he good thoughts of his own ways, because his thoughts now agree with the judgment of the Word of God. P CHRISTIAN EXPOSES IGNORANCE. 169 IGNOR. What are good thoughts concerning God? CHR. Even, as I have said concerning ourselves, when our thoughts of God do agree with what the Word saith of Him; and that is, when we think of His being and attriButes as the Word hath taught, of which I cannot now discourse at large. But to speak of Him with reference to us : then we have right thoughts of God, when we think that He knows us better than we know ourselves, and can see sin in us when and where we can see none in ourselves; when we think He knows our inmost thoughts, and that our heart, with all its depths, is always open unto His eyes: also, when we think that all our righteousness stinks in His nostrils, and that therefore He cannot abide to see us stand before Him in any confidence, even in all our best performances. IGNOR. Do you think that I am such a fool as to think God can see no farther than I? or, that I would come to God in the best of my performances? CHR. Why, how dost thou think in this matter? IGNOR. Why, to be short, I think I must believe in Christ for justification. CHR. How! Think thou must believe in Christ, when thou seest not thy need of Him! Thou neither seest thy original nor actual infirmities, but hast such an opinion of thyself, and of what thou doest, as plainly renders thee to be one that did never see a necessity of Christ's personal righteousness to justify thee before God. How then dost thou say, I believe in Christ? |