Will. Accusativo, hunc.

Evans. I pray you, have your remembrance, child; accu

sativo, hung, hang, hog.

Quick. Hang-hog is Latin for bacon, I warrant you.

Evans. Leave your prabbles, 'oman.

tive case, William ?

Will. O,-Vocativo, O.

What is the foca

Evans. Remember, William; focative is caret.

Quick. And that's a good root.

Evans. 'Oman, forbear.

Mrs. Page. Peace!

Evans. What is your genitive case plural, William?
Will. Genitive case!

Evans. Ay.

Will. Genitivo, - horum, harum, horum.

Quick. Vengeance of Jenny's case! fie on her!

-

name her, child, if she be a whore.

Evans. For shame, 'oman.

never

he

Quick. You do ill to teach the child such words: teaches him to hick and to hack, which they'll do fast enough of themselves, and to call whorum : — fie upon you!

Evans. 'Oman, art thou lunatics? hast thou no understandings for thy cases, and the numbers and the genders? Thou art as foolish Christian creatures as I would desires. Mrs. Page. Pr'ythee, hold thy peace.

Evans. Show me now, William, some declensions of your pronouns.

Will. Forsooth, I have forgot.

Evans. It is qui, quæ, quod: if you forget your quies, your quas, and your quods, you must be preeches.2 Go your ways, and play; go.

2 Preeches is Sir Hugh's word for breeched, that is flogged. So in Beaumont and Fletcher's Little French Lawyer, v. 1: "Kneeling and whining like a boy new-breech'd." And in The Hog hath lost his Pearl: "Had not

Mrs. Page. He is a better scholar than I thought he was. Evans. He is a good sprag3 memory. Farewell, Mistress Page.

Mrs. Page. Adieu, good Sir Hugh. [Exit Sir HUGH.] Get you home, boy. — Come, we stay too long.

[Exeunt.

SCENE II. - A Room in FORD'S House.

Enter FALSTAFF and Mistress FORD.

Fal. Mistress Ford, your sorrow hath eaten up my sufferance. I see you are obsequious in your love, and I profess requital to a hair's breadth; not only, Mistress Ford, in the simple office of love, but in all the accoutrement, complement, and ceremony of it. But are you sure of your husband now?

Mrs. Ford. He's a-birding, sweet Sir John.

Mrs. Page. [Within.] What, ho, gossip Ford! what, ho! Mrs. Ford. Step into the chamber, Sir John.

Enter Mistress PAGE.

[Exit FALSTAFF.

Mrs. Page. How now, sweetheart! who's at home besides yourself?

Mrs. Ford. Why, none but mine own people.

Mrs. Page. Indeed!

Mrs. Ford. No, certainly. [Aside to her.] Speak louder. Mrs. Page. Truly, I am so glad you have nobody here. Mrs. Ford. Why?

Mrs. Page. Why, woman, your husband is in his old

his courteous serving-man convey'd me away, whilst he went to fetch whips, I think in my conscience he would have breech'd me."

3 Sprag for sprack, which means ready or quick, like our spry.

:

lunes again he so takes on yonder with my husband; so rails against all married mankind; so curses all Eve's daughters, of what complexion soever; and so buffets himself on the forehead, crying, Peer out, peer out!2 that any madness I ever yet beheld seem'd but tameness, civility, and patience, to this his distemper he is in now: I am glad the fat knight is not here.

Mrs. Ford. Why, does he talk of him?

Mrs. Page. Of none but him; and swears he was carried out, the last time he search'd for him, in a basket; protests to my husband he is now here; and hath drawn him and the rest of their company from their sport, to make another experiment of his suspicion: but I am glad the knight is not here; now he shall see his own foolery.

Mrs. Ford. How near is he, Mistress Page?

Mrs. Page. Hard by; at street end; he will be here anon. Mrs. Ford. I am undone ! the knight is here.

Mrs. Page. Why, then you are utterly shamed, and he's but a dead man. What a woman are you! Away with him, away with him! better shame than murder.

Mrs. Ford. Which way should he go? how should I bestow him? Shall I put him into the basket again?

Re-enter FALSTAFF.

Fal. No, I'll come no more i' the basket. May I not go out ere he come?

Mrs. Page. Alas, three of Master Ford's brothers watch the door with pistols, that none shall issue out; otherwise you might slip away ere he came. But what make you here?

1 Lunes for fits of lunacy, or mad freaks. So in Troilus and Cressida, ii. 3: "His pettish lunes, his ebbs, his flows."

2 So, it appears, children were wont to sport in calling on a snail to thrust forth its horns:

Peer out, peer out, peer out of your hole,
Or else I'll beat you as black as a coal.

Fal. What shall I do? I'll creep up into the chimney. Mrs. Ford. There they always use to discharge their birding-pieces.

Mrs. Page. Creep into the kiln-hole.

Fal. Where is it?

Mrs. Ford. He will seek there, on my word. Neither press, coffer, chest, trunk, well, vault, but he hath an abstract 3 for the remembrance of such places, and goes to them by his note: there is no hiding you in the house.

Fal. I'll go out, then.

Mrs. Page. If you go out in your own semblance, you die, Sir John. Unless you go out disguised,

Mrs. Ford.

How might we disguise him?

Mrs. Page. Alas the day, I know not! There is no woman's gown big enough for him; otherwise he might put on a hat, a muffler, and a kerchief, and so escape.

Fal. Good hearts, devise something: any extremity rather than a mischief.

Mrs. Ford. My maid's aunt, the fat woman of Brentford, has a gown above.

Mrs. Page. On my word, it will serve him; she's as big as he is and there's her thrumm'd hat, and her muffler too.4- Run up, Sir John.

Mrs. Ford. Go, go, sweet Sir John: Mistress Page and I will look some linen for your head.

Mrs. Page. Quick, quick! we'll come dress you straight: put on the gown the while. [Exit FALSTAFF.

Mrs. Ford. I would my husband would meet him in this shape he cannot abide the old woman of Brentford; he swears she's a witch; forbade her my house, and hath threaten'd to beat her.

8 Abstract for brief statement or inventory written out.

4 A hat made of weaver's tufts or thrums, or of coarse cloth. - A muffler was an article of female attire which covered only the lower part of the face.

Mrs. Page. Heaven guide him to thy husband's cudgel, and the Devil guide his cudgel afterwards!

Mrs. Ford. But is my husband coming?

Mrs. Page. Ay, in good sadness,5 is he; and talks of the basket too, howsoever he hath had intelligence.

Mrs. Ford. We'll try that; for I'll appoint my men to carry the basket again, to meet him at the door with it, as they did last time.

Mrs. Page. Nay, but he'll be here presently: let's go dress him like the witch of Brentford.

Mrs. Ford. I'll first direct my men what they shall do with the basket. Go up; I'll bring linen for him straight.

[Exit. Mrs. Page. Hang him, dishonest varlet! we cannot misuse him enough.

We'll leave a proof, by that which we will do,
Wives may be merry, and yet honest too:

We do not act that often jest and laugh;

'Tis old, but true, Still swine eat all the draff. [Exit.

Re-enter Mistress FORD with two Servants.

Mrs. Ford. Go, sirs, take the basket again on your shoulders: your master is hard at door; if he bid you set it down, obey him: quickly, dispatch.

I Serv. Come, come, take it up.

[Exit.

2 Serv. Pray Heaven it be not full of knight again.
1 Serv. I hope not; I had as lief bear so much lead.

Enter FORD, PAGE, SHALLOW, CAIUS, and Sir HUGH EVANS.

Ford. Ay, but if it prove true, Master Page, have you any way then to unfool me again? - Set down the basket,

5 "Good sadness" is good earnest. Sad and sadness were often used thus. See vol. iv., page 170, note 11.