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above fome of our neighbouring ruftics; but who can have a manner, that has never feen the Pantheon, the Grotto Gardens, the Borough, and fuck places where the nobility chiefly refort? All I can do, is to enjoy London at fecond-hand. I take care to know every tête à-tête from the fcandalous magazine, and have all the fashions, as they come out, in a letter from the two Mifs Rickets of Crooked. lane. Pray how do you like this head, Mr. Haftings?

HASTINGS.

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Extremely elegant and degagée, upon my word, madam. Your frifeur is a Frenchman, I fuppofe?

Mrs. HARDCASTLE.

I proteft I dreffed it myself from a print in the la dies memorandum-book for the laft t year.

HASTINGS.

Indeed! Such a head in a fide-box, at the playhouse, would draw as many gazers as my lady may'refs at a city ball.

Mrs. HARDCASTLE.

I vow, fince inoculation began, there is no fuch thing to be seen as a plain woman; so one must drefs a little particular, or one may escape in the crowd.

HASTINGS.

But that can never be your cafe, madam, in any ́ drefs. (Bowing.)

Mrs.

Mrs. HARDCASTLE.

Yet, what fignifies my dreffing when I have fuch a piece of antiquity by my fide as Mr. Hardcastle: all I can fay will never argue down a fingle button from his cloaths. I have often wanted him to throw off his great flaxon wig, and where he was bald, to plaifter it over, like my Lord Pately, with powder.

HASTINGS.

You are right, madam; for, as among the ladies there are none ugly, fo among the men there are none old.

Mrs. HARDCASTLE.

But what do you think his anfwer was? Why, with his ufual Gothic vivacity, he faid I only wanted him to throw off his wig to convert it into a tête for my own wearing.

HASTINGS.

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Intolerable! At your age you may wear what you pleafe, and it muft become you.

Mrs. HARDCASTLE.

Pray, Mr. Haftings, what do you take to be the

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most fashionable age about town?

HASTINGS.

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Some time ago, forty was all the mode; but I'm told the ladies intend to bring up fifty for the enfuing winter.

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Mrs. HARDCASTLE.
Then I fhall be too young for the

HAST

HASTINGS.

No lady begins, now to put on jewels 'till he's past forty. For instance, Mifs there, in a polite circle, would be confidered as a child, as, a mere maker of famplers.

Mrs. HARDCASTLE.

And yet Mrs. Niece thinks herself as much a woman, and is as fond of jewels as the oldeft of us all.

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Your niece, is he? And that young gentleman, a brother of yours, I fhould prefume?

Mrs. HARDCASTLE.

My fon, Sir. They are contracted to each other. Obferve their little fports. They fall in and out ten times a day, as if they were man and wife already. (To them) Well, Tony, child, what foft things are you faying to your coufin Conftance this ⚫evening?

TONY.

I have been saying no soft things; but that it's very hard to be followed about fo. Ecod! I've not a place in the house now that's left to myself, but the ftable.

Mrs. HARDCASTLE

Never mind him, Con, my dear. He's in another ftory behind your back.

Mifs NEVILLE.

There's fomething generous in my coufin's manner. He falls out before faces to be forgiven in private.

TONY.

That's a damned confounded-crack.

Mrs. HARDCASTLE.

Ah! he's a fly one. Don't you think they're like each other about the mouth, Mr. Haftings? The Blenkinsop mouth to a T. They're of a fize too. Back to back, my pretties, that Mr. Haftings,, may fee you. Come, Tony.

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TONY.'

You had as good not make me, I tell you.

Mifs NEVILLE.

(Measuring.)

Olud! he has almost cracked my head.

Mrs. HARDCASTLE.

O the monster! For fhame, Tony. You a man, and behave fo!

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If I'm a man, let me have my fortin. Ecod! I'll not be made a fool of no longer.

Mrs. HARDCASTLE.

Is this, ungrateful boy, all that I'm to get for the pain's I have taken in your education? I that have rock'd you in your cradle, and fed that pretty mouth with a spoon! Did not I work that waistcoat to make you genteel? Did not I prefcribe for

you

you every day, and weep while the receipt was operating?

TONY.

Ecod! you had reason to weep, for you have been dofing me ever fince I was born. I have gone through every receipt in the complete housewife ten times over; and you have thoughts of courfing me through Quincy next spring.

But, ecod! 1 tell

you, I'll not be made a fool of no longer.

Mrs. HARDCASTLE.

Wasn't it all for your good, viper? Wasn't it all for you good?

TONY.

I wish you'd let me and my good alone then. Snubbing this way when I'm in fpirits. If I'm to have any good, let it come of itself; not to keep dinging it, dinging it into one fo.

Mrs. HARDCASTLE.

That's falfe; I never fee you when you're in fpirits. No, Tony, you then go to the alehouse or kennel. I'm never to be delighted with your agreeable, wild notes, unfeeling monfter!

TONY.

Ecod! mamma, your own notes are the wildest of the two.

Mrs. HARDCASTLE.

Was ever the like? But I fee he wants to break

my heart, I fee he does.

HAST.

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