HARDCASTLE. For fupper, Sir! (Afide) Was ever fuch a request to a man in his own houfe! MARLOW. Yes, Sir, fupper, Sir; I begin to feel an appetite. I fhall make dev'lish work to night in the larder, I promise you. HARDCASTLE. (Afide) Such a brazen dog fure never my eyes beheld. (o him) Why really, Sir, as for fupper I can't well tell. My Dorothy, and the cook-maid, fettle these things between them. I leave thefe kind of things entirely to them. Entirely. By-the-bye, I believe they are in actual confultation upon what's for fupper this moment in the kitchen. MARLOW. Then I beg they'll admit me as one of their privy council. It's a way I have got. When I travel, I always chufe to regulate my own fupper. Let the cook be called. No offence I hope, Sir. : HARDCASTLE. O no, Sir, none in the leaft; yet I don't know how our Bridget, the cook-maid, is not very communicative upon thefe occafions. Should we fend for her, the might fcold us all out of the house. HAST HASTINGS. Let's fee your lift of the larder then. I afk it as a favour. I always match my appetite to my bill of fare. MARLOW. (To Hardcastle, who looks at them with furprize) Sir, he's very right, and it's my way too. HARDCASTLE. Here, Sir, you have a right to command here. Roger, bring us the bill of fare for to night's fupper. I believe it's drawn out. Your manner, Mr. Haftings, puts me in mind of my uncle, colonel Wallop. It was a faying of his, that no man was fure of his fupper till he had eaten it. HASTINGS. (Afide) all upon the high ropes! His uncle a colonel! we fhall foon hear of his mother being a juftice of peace. But let's hear the bill of fare. MARLOW. (Perufing) What's here? For the firft courfe? for the fecond courfe; for the defert. The devil, Sir, do you think we have brought down the whole joiners company, or the corporation of Bedford, to eat up fuch a fupper? Two or three little things, clean and comfortable, will do. HASTINGS. But, let's hear it. MAR. MARLOW. (Reading) For the first course at the top, a pig, and pruin fauce. HASTINGS, Damn your pig, I fay. MARLOW. And damn your pruin fauce, fay I, HARDCASTLE. And yet, gentlemen, to men that are hungry, pig, with pruin fauce, is very good eating. MARLOW. At the bottom a calve's tongue and brains. HASTINGS. Let your brains be knock'd out, my good Sir, I don't like them. MARLOW. Or you may clap them on a plate by themselves. (Afide) Their impudence confounds me, (To them) Gentlemen, you are my guefts, make what alterations you please. Is there any thing else you wish to retrench or alter, gentlemen ? MARLOW. Item. A pork pye, a boiled rabbit and sausages, a Florentine, a fhaking pudding, and a dish of tifftaff-taffety cream? HASTINGS Confound your made dishes, I fhall be as much at a lofs in this hoafe as at a green and yellow din ner ner at the French ambassador's table. I'm for plain eating, I'm forry, gentlemen, that I have nothing you like, but if there be any thing you have a particular fancy to MARLOW. Why, really, Sir, your bill of fare is fo exquifite, that any one part of it is full as good as another. Send us what you pleafe. So much for fupper. And now to fee that our beds are air'd, and properly taken care of. HARDCASTLE. I entreat you'll leave all that to me. You fhall not stir a step. MARLOW. Leave that to you! I proteft, Sir, you must ex cufe me, I always look to these things myself. HARDCASTLE. I must infift, Sir, you'll make yourself eafy on that head. MARLOW. You fee I'm refolv'd on it. (Afide) A very troublefome fellow this, as I ever met with. HARDCASTLE. Well, Sir, I'm refolved at least to attend you. (Afide) This may be modern modefty, but I never faw any thing look fo like old-fashioned impudence. [Exeunt Marlow and Hardcastle. HAST 1 So I find this fellow's civilities begin to grow troublesome. But who can be angry at those affiduities which are meant to please him? Ha! what do I fee? Mifs Neville, by all that's happy! Enter Mifs NEVILLE. Mifs NEVILLE. My dear Haftings! To what unexpected good fortune? to what accident, am I to afcribe this hap-py meeting? HASTINGS. Rather let me afk the fame queftion, as I could never have hoped, to meet my dearest Conftance at an inn. Mifs NEVILLE. An inn! fure you mistake! my aunt, my guardian, lives here. What could induce you to think this houfe an inn? HASTINGS. My friend, Mr. Marlow, with whom I came down, and I, have been fent here as to an inn, I affure you. A young fellow whom we accidentally met at a house hard by directed us hither. Mifs NEVILLE. Certainly it muft be one of my hopeful coufin's tricks, of whom you have heard me talk fo often, ha! ha! ha! HAST |