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Gentle reader, you do me injustice. I trust I have neither a cold, nor calculating soul; but, on the contrary, one that fully appreciates les délices of love in a cottage; but the idea of a cottage is quoad the ideas of him or her who thinks about it. A cottage (a thatched one if you like) I in no shape object to; let it contain a decent dining room, wide enough, for they are mostly long enough for quite as many as one would wish to see at dinner ; but I say wide enough, that a servant is not obliged to elbow our shoulders in carrying away the tureen ; a drawing-room that does not suffocate one's friends; a breakfast room that the heat of the urn does not convert into a forcing house; and a small-I mean a small library, where a man may ensconce himself when he wishes to play sulky. This, with a four-stall stable, and two loose boxes, will do ; and love will very probably go on in the cottage-cottage and thatched though it be. But one of those little coffins for the living, described as having coach-house and stabling, by which is meant a place where a pony phaeton under duty can be put in, with a pony also under duty stuck in behind it, is altogether a little abomination; a small horror, that no man fond of air and exercise would continue long to inhabit, while the Serpentine parades its broad expanse of water to receive him. Better be there, than inhale the piggy atmosphere of the detested baby-house. Babyhouse, I mean, from its dimensions; but if, under such circumstances and in such a place, a baby is added, the thing admits of no delaythe Serpentine, aye, the Serpentine, and “go

go at once." It may be asked, “What has all this to do with post horses, Swallow-street, and Mr. Newman the post-master?" A great deal; the chubby gentleman having done his work, sent his victims or protegés (as the case may be) to Swallow-street; there they found Mr. Newman's office. He found the posters; and by their aid the loving pair (not of horses, for four were ordered) soon found themselves at Gretna Green: and perhaps no man has sent more pairs of both bipeds and quadrupeds to that far-famed Green than Mr. Newman ; and this, as I before said, made Swallow-street one of considerable importance.

Now we manage things in another manner; and the rail beats the . poster, “ Moulsey Hurst to an egg-shell.” Cold indeed must be the flame that cannot keep the steam up at high pressure between London and Scotland; but yet it is somewhat extraordinary, that short as the transit is to and fro, the safety-valve is frequently much oftener resorted to on the journey from than it was in the journey to the north, and that a good deal depends upon whether the anticipated ménage is to be in the cottage with the four stalls and loose boxes, &c., or the detested turtle-dove cage with the under-duty phaeton and the still more detestable under-duty little beast of a pony.

Although personally I am a sporting writer, or, at all events, a writer on sporting matters, I trust my métier is not altogether so grovelling, distinct, and gross, as to render me incapable of appreciating, or occasionally writing on subjects of a higher caste than a horse or a hound. The time was, when all sporting men were Squire Westerns; and bad the Sporting Magazine existed in those times, its readers would have been all of that class; consequently, anything that was not absolutely confined to horse and dog only, or written in

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anything but stable and kennel language, would have been passed over. But now, sporting periodicals, or books on sporting subjects, are read by men who do like a little occasional interlarding of something different; though, like variations composed on any favourite air, the original must not be lost sight of, but, on the contrary, pervade the whole, and be returned to in all its original simplicity. I mention

an excuse for digression. Such little variations on horse matters I trust are not unpleasing to many readers, so I take the liberty of introducing another.

Doubtless the posters--and particularly Mr. Newman's posters-have carried many an enamoured couple to the fulfilment of their wishes and the completion of their happiness; but I fear the odds always run heavily against so happy a result. Cerulean or hazel eyes, auburn or raven locks, are beauteous to look upon, whether the owner be the peeress or the peasant; and the smile may be radiant, and the heart beat warmly, whether the beauty be clothed in silk or serge; but this depends on whether the garb is such as the wearer has been accustomed to, for a trip to Gretna, that brings the wedded fair back to a seat in a nursing-chair, instead of the accustomed one in the chariot or britzska, is not usually recollected without wishes by no means in favour of the poster or his master. The railroads come in for their share also, no doubt; but they settle the matter in less time; so perhaps, like a beef-steak, or the “it” alluded to in Macbeth, if any lady contemplates this hazardous journey, “ 'twere well 'twere done quickly;" and then, to descend to stable language, the odds are, one or both of the happy couple are done.

The general characteristic of the poster, I should say, has probably undergone as little change during the last half or complete century than that of any other horse; for the poster was always used for fast purposes, and next to the express sent by single horse, the post-chaise was the fastest conveyance known to our ancestors. They were made light comparatively with other carriages; and the greatest dread of a post-boy was, and is now, in post-stable phrase, "a bounder”--that is, a travelling chariot. It is indeed, when well loaded, with rumble and dicky full, and two and Bodkin as insides, a fearful weight for two light horses; but heavy as the bounder is, as posting was always expected to be something like fast work, nothing but well-bred horses were found equal to that work; so, thanks to the kindness and gratitude of man, the fate of the once-favourite hunter and the oncefavourite starter for a stakes or handicap was the post-chaise. Hundreds of such have breathed their last (from over-exertion) in the several post-stables on the Bath-road—some to gratify the cupidity of a post-master, who would send a pair at times four ten-mile stages--eighty miles--to get the four times fifteen shillings; others to gratify the impatience of travellers, who would bribe the boys to do a stage ten minutes within time, though probably, so far as regarded the importance or utility of some travellers to mankind, it mattered little whether he ever arrived at his destination or remained for life on the road. But what matters this? Is the favoured child of fortune to be baulked of his slightest wish? “ Forbid it heaven! the hermit cried.” What is the neck of a plebeian post-boy, what is the agony or death of a hundred animals (noble though they be), com

pared with the grand desideratum that the Honourable Augustus is not curtailed ot' five minutes of his allotted toilet-time? Better all the invalided best animals in creation should breathe their last, better all the post-boys Hounslow once boasted should risk-aye, breaktheir necks, than an incomplete tie of the cravat should be exhibited at dinner, or that one curl should be badly arranged that decks the Madonna-head of Lady Carolina Clementina Amelia Somebody; for it is usually for about such important circumstances that increased pace, and consequently increased suffering, is called for. Man, man ! what or whom will you not sacrifice for one moment's self-gratification !

Few animals suffered more than the poster. True, he was well fed, well lodged, and generally well attended—no thanks to his master. The post-chaise was put under shelter to preserve it for the use of its owner; the horse was well fed to enable him to do extra work. If starving him would have made him do more, starved he would have been.

I remember a coach-owner-he lived at Maidenhead, “ The Bear" his inn. On the coach starting, he invariably called out to the coachman, “ Don't spare 'em.” This was to show his desire to please passengers : many, no doubt, he pleased by saying this. If it were merely a ruse de guerre, I gave him credit for it; if he meant it, it proved bim to be an avaricious brute: but as I have no reason to suppose our host was this, I dare say he showed his tact in what he did or said ; but I know of many who would carry the thing into effect if they could gain a penny by it.

Hail, thou man of iron ! thou eldest son of fortune! Hail, great Hudson! for though report does not speak of thee as one who makes all others feel the influence of thy wealth by extraordinary benevolence or liberality of pay, still the spirits of departed posters shall plead for thee at the eleventh hour ; for though post-masters may execrate thy rails, and rail at thee, each of these rails saves some noble animal hours and days of pain and suffering, by diminishing the numbers of the post-horses; and the ever-to-be-lauded M‘Adam is the best friend the horse can boast, by rendering his labour comparatively easy and light.

THE STREET-CAB HORSE. If horses could speak, few living beings could tell queerer tales of men than some horses could; and certainly no horse could afford so multitudinous and varied a list of anecdotes as the street-cab horse, whether he be the unfortunate animal employed by day, or the still more ill-used, wretched victim braving all the misery of a winter's night, subject to the brutality, drunkenness, avarice, and ill temper of a hired driver, and that driver one of as great a set of miscreants as inhabit the earth. The common system or custom is, these drivers must, on an average, bring home a certain sum; after that, all they can get out of the overwearied animal goes into their pockets. Watch the anxiety of these fellows to get a fare. If they see a person approach whom they consider likely to want a cab, they lay the whip into the unfortunate horse, and gallop, if a gallop can be got out of him, up to the coming, anticipated fare. Sometimes they succeed by this, oftener not. This is perhaps repeated ten times a day; and if disappointed, I have generally seen the horse suffer for it. No one can suppose this anxiety proceeds from any proper feeling for their employer; it solely arises from a desire to make up the stipulated sum, that the next three shillings may go into their own pockets. We will suppose, after the necessary sum has been made up, and the driver had got a shilling or two over and above for himself, and his horse, consequently, all but knocked up-we will say he was on the stand in Piccadilly, and the owner's stables in the neighbourhood of Dorset-square or Lisson-grove. One would suppose common humanity would induce him to take the poor brute home. Not he; he would drive him to Vauxhall if a fare offered; and if he could not get full price, he would go for half, for it would be only the horse that would suffer, and he would flay him alive to make him do the distance for the sake of a fill of gin, to gratify his own babitual and beastly propensity.

It is singular, but fact, that in a general way all animals are used more cruelly by the very persons who get their bread by them than by any others. I believe this, so far as their labour goes, arises from avarice; they never think they get enough out of the animal ; but, independent of this, they rarely have any kindly feelings towards him, when the-natural supposition would be that they would be fond of an animal from whose exertions they derived comfort for themselves and families. But this is not the case. I never knew a coach-owner or post-master who cared more for his horses than he did for their harness ; he saw that the former got what corn was necessary, and the latter what oil, but it was only done to preserve them the longer to earn him more money ; but whether it be horses or dancing-dogs, bears or monkeys, the owners of them generally ill use them. Of all men who earn money by the labour of their horses, farmers, much to their credit, generally treat them the most kindly; but they do not exclusively make their money by their horses' labour ; if they did, perhaps they would treat them no better than others do. There seems a kind of devilish feeling in man, as if they wished to punish or, at all events, to be careless of the feelings of the animal because they are in a certain way under obligations to him.

The description of horse used for cabs no one could specify, for, with the exception of the cart-horse and pony, all sorts of horses find their way into these vehicles of suffering, from the punch to the race-horse, according with the opinion of the owner as to what sort he thinks does his work the best.

Perhaps no working horse in the whole metropolis is employed in the service of such various grades of society as the street-cab horse, or draws up to the doors of such different habitations ; he is seen at the entrance to the palace—in another hour at that of the lowest den in the Seven Dials ; duke, demerip, and drunkard--peer, prisoner, and pickpocket-count, cadger, and costermonger-all occasionally avail themselves of his service ; carries the hilarious or the wretched to their several destinations ; the lover to his mistress, or the libertine from her whom honour imperiously tells him he never should desert ; he takes the heir to receive his patrimony, and perhaps lasts quite long enough to afterwards take him to a prison ; he takes two friends, gay with champagne and affluence, to the gaming-house, and waits to bring away one of them a ruined man, leaving the more fortunate to be led on till he also shares the same fate ; he takes the anxious wife to her expectant husband and her happy home, and, after the theatre, takes the wearied but gaily-dressed frequenter of the saloon to her home, if home it can be called, there to wet her pillow with tears of disappointment, mortification, and apprehension ; and further, conveys at times many a fair scion of aristocracy with what trinkets and valuables she can spare to where she cản raise funds to meet current expenses, and in her welllighted rooms friends who little dream of where she had been the few hours preceding, and, much I fear, little would they care if they did know, further than to raise a whisper at her expense or pay more assiduous attention in some more wealthy quarter.

In taking a cab from a stand every person, in justice to themselves and the public, should make it a rule to take the best appointed, that is, the best dressed driver, the horse in the best condition, and the cleanest kept cab. This should be done for two reasons : first, the man who does his work the best deserves the most encouragement; and secondly, when the man is dirty and the horse starved, in nine cases out of ten it will be found he spends that money in drink that should go to feed his horse and family ; such a man, for the sake of drink, will be certain to impose more than the other, and it is much more than probable he will be insolent and abusive. If every one would reject the worst turns-out, interest would make the owner and driver take more pains with them ; the remedy for the wretched things we see on the stand remains with the public; but as some months since I wrote an article in the Sporting Magazine, on this subject I will not intrude further with it.

THE WHITECIIAPEL AND DOG-CART HORSE. Though I cannot designate the horse that is employed in these vehicles, there is generally something of character both about the horse that draws and the man who drives them ; be he what he may, he is usually a bit of a coachman, and knows what he is about.

If the cart is at all a knowing-looking one, my life on it the horse is so also, and most probably something of a trotter; and when this is the case I should infer the owner is not one that every fool could get quite the best of when wide awake; and if asleep, I expect would rouse himself quite iu time to prevent such an event. We frequently see

a brute of a horse in an ordinary gig, and often a kind of Hanoverian going, flowing mane and tail, parade-like, useless animal in a Tilbury ; we see neither of them in the Whitechapel or dog cart ; he is generally a light-headed, light-hearted, blood-like nay, that looks as if he meant going; and generally go he can, with his head and tail up-his nose, perliaps, a little out, like a deer’s, and looking independently about him as if going was no trouble to him; and further, as if he could equally accommodate you with a gallop, at something like steeple-chase pace. These are the sort to get away; not merely going with the high action of a pig in a yoke-flinging their feet right and left-just scooping up a hoof full of mud-throwing it on each side, and putting down the scoop only twelve inches more forward than it was.' No: the dog-cart horse has action high enough for safety and good going, but without darting: when he lifts his

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