BRUDDER GARDNER ON "BIG WORDS."

COMEDY NEGRO-DIALECT ADDRESS.

M. QUAD.

IT

Tam once ag'in my painful dooty to speak to de members in regard to de use of big words. It was only last night as I walked home from prayer-meetin' along wid Waydown Bebee dat he keerlessly obsarved dat de eliminashun of de elucidashun appeared to coerce de cohesion of de gratificashun. What on airth he meant I can't say, but I know he felt proud ober his flow of language. A week ago I was in a feed-store when Samuel Shin come in arter fodder for his old mewl. He didn't dun see me, an' as he laid down thirty cents he remarked dat de problematical disqualificashun had werry much embarrassed de unexpected arsimilashun. De feed-store man didn't fall dead, but I don't know why he didn't. Two days since, when Samuel Shin was axed if he believed de whale swallered Joner, he puffed out his chest an' replied dat his perversity of de sinnosity led him to articulate to de pomposity. If yo' was to ax him what he meant, he couldn't tell yo', but he's feelin' werry proud of them big words. I ain't gwine to waste no time ober dis subject. Mebbe de strangulashun of de reservashun exceeds de placidity of de impecuniosity, an' mebbe de gratificashun of de realizashun limits. de verbosity of de paralysis. As to dis I can't say, but I do know, an' I gib de members of dis club fair warnin', dat if dar am any mo' concentrashun of de consequentiality around yere I shall purceed to eventuate de diagram of de monstrosity in a way to particulate de effervescence of de ardusity. We want nuffin but plain words, an' words dat we kin all understan', an' from dis time on we shall eventuate de glorosity of de English language or maintain a consanguinity of calamitous configurashun.

WHEN MAGGIE GANGS AWAY.

JAMES HOGG.

H, what will a' the lads do

When Maggie gangs away?

Oh, what will a' the lads do
When Maggie gangs away?
There's no a heart in a' the glen
That doesna dread the day:

Oh, what will a' the lads do
When Maggie gangs away?

Young Jock has ta'en the hill for't-
A waefu' wight is he;

Poor Harry's ta'en the bed for't,
And laid him down to dee;
And Sandy's gane unto the kirk,

And learnin' fast to pray:

And oh, what will the lads do
When Maggie gangs away?

The young laird o' the Lang-Shaw
Has drunk her health in wine;
The priest has said (in confidence)
The lassie was divine:

And that is mair in maiden's praise
Than any priest should say:

But oh, what will the lads do
When Maggie gangs away?

The wailing in our green glen
That day will quaver high;

"Twill draw the red-breast frae the wood, The laverock frae the sky;