The tapetless, ramfeezl'd hizzie,

She's saft at best, and something lazy,
Quo' she 'Ye ken we've been sae busy,
This month an' mair,

That trouth my head is grown quite dizzie,
An' something sair.'

Her dowff excuses pat me mad;
'Conscience,' says I, 'ye thowless jad!
I'll write, an' that a hearty blaud,
This very night;

So dinna ye affront your trade,
But rhyme it right.

'Shall bauld Lapraik, the king o' hearts,
Tho' mankind were a pack o' cartes,
Roose you sae weel for your deserts,
In terms sae friendly,

Yet ye'll neglect to shaw your parts,
An' thank him kindly?'

Sae I gat paper in a blink,

An' down gaed stumpie in the ink:
Quoth I 'Before I sleep a wink,
I vow I'll close it;

An if ye winna mak it clink,

By Jove, I'll prose it!'

Sae I've begun to scrawl, but whether
In rhyme, or prose, or baith thegither,
Or some hotch-potch that's rightly neither,
Let time mak proof;

But I shall scribble down some blether
Just clean aff-loof.

My worthy friend, ne'er grudge an' carp,
Tho' fortune use you hard an' sharp;
Come, kittle up your moorland harp
Wi' gleesome touch!

Ne'er mind how fortune waft an' warp;
She's but a bitch.

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She's gien me mony a jirt an' fleg,
Sin' I could striddle owre a rig;
But, by the Lord, tho' I should beg
Wi' lyart pow,

I'll laugh, an' sing, an' shake my leg,
As lang's I dow!

Now comes the sax-an'-twentieth simmer
I've seen the bud upo' the timmer,
Still persecuted by the limmer,
Frae year to year:

But yet, despite the kittle kimmer,
I, Rob, am here.

Do ye envy the city gent,

Behind a kist to lie an' sklent,

Or purse-proud, big wi' cent per cent
An' muckle wame,

In some bit brugh to represent
A bailie's name?

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Or is 't the paughty feudal thane,

Wi' ruffl'd sark an' glancing cane,

Wha thinks himsel nae sheep-shank bane,

But lordly stalks,

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While caps and bonnets aff are taen,
As by he walks?

'O Thou wha gies us each guid gift!
Gie me o' wit an' sense a lift,
Then turn me, if Thou please, adrift,
Thro' Scotland wide;

Wi' cits nor lairds I wadna shift,
In a' their pride!'

Were this the charter of our state, 'On pain o' hell be rich an' great,' Damnation then would be our fate,

Beyond remead;

But, thanks to Heaven! that's no the gate
We learn our creed.

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For thus the royal mandate ran,
When first the human race began,
The social, friendly, honest man,
Whate'er he be,

"Tis he fulfils great Nature's plan,
And none but he!'

O mandate glorious and divine!
The followers of the ragged Nine,
Poor, thoughtless devils! yet may shine,
In glorious light,

While sordid sons of Mammon's line
Are dark as night.

Tho' here they scrape, an' squeeze, an' growl,
Their worthless nievefu' of a soul
May in some future carcase howl,
The forest's fright;

Or in some day-detesting owl

May shun the light.

Then may Lapraik and Burns arise,
To reach their native kindred skies,
And sing their pleasures, hopes, an' joys,
In some mild sphere,

Still closer knit in friendship's ties
Each passing year!

TO WILLIAM SIMPSON.

I GAT your letter, winsome Willie ;
Wi' gratefu' heart I thank you brawlie;
Tho' I maun say't, I wad be silly,
An' unco vain,

Should I believe, my coaxin' billie,
Your flatterin' strain.

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But I'se believe ye kindly meant it:
I sud be laith to think ye hinted
Ironic satire, sidelins sklented

On my poor Musie;

Tho' in sic phraisin' terms ye've penn'd it,
I scarce excuse ye.

My senses wad be in a creel,
Should I but dare a hope to speel,

Wi' Allan, or wi' Gilbertfield,
The braes o' fame;

Or Fergusson, the writer-chiel,
A deathless name.

(O Fergusson! thy glorious parts
Ill suited law's dry, musty arts!
My curse upon your whunstane hearts,
Ye E'nbrugh gentry!

The tythe o' what ye waste at cartes
Wad stow'd his pantry!)

Yet when a tale comes i' my head,
Or lasses gie my heart a screed,
As whiles they're like to be my dead,
(O sad disease!)

I kittle up my rustic reed;

It gies me ease.

Auld Coila, now, may fidge fu' fain,
She's gotten poets o' her ain,

Chiels wha their chanters winna hain,
But tune their lays,

Till echoes a' resound again

Her weel-sung praise.

Nae poet thought her worth his while,
To set her name in measur'd style;
She lay like some unkenn'd-of isle,
Beside New Holland,
Or where wild-meeting oceans boil
Besouth Magellan.

Ramsay an' famous Fergusson
Gied Forth an' Tay a lift aboon;
Yarrow an' Tweed, to mony a tune,
Owre Scotland rings,

While Irwin, Lugar, Ayr, an' Doon,
Naebody sings.

Th' Ilissus, Tiber, Thames, an' Seine,
Glide sweet in mony a tunefu' line;
But, Willie, set your fit to mine,

An' cock your crest,

We'll gar our streams an' burnies shine
Up wi' the best.

We'll sing auld Coila's plains an' fells,
Her moors red-brown wi' heather bells,
Her banks an' braes, her dens an' dells,
Where glorious Wallace
Aft bure the gree, as story tells,

Frae Southron billies.

At Wallace' name, what Scottish blood
But boils up in a spring-tide flood!
Oft have our fearless fathers strode
By Wallace' side,

Still pressing onward, red-wat-shod,
Or glorious died.

O, sweet are Coila's haughs an' woods,
When lintwhites chant amang the buds,
And jinkin' hares, in amorous whids,

Their loves enjoy,

While thro' the braes the cushat croods
Wi' wailfu' cry!

Ev'n winter bleak has charms to me
When winds rave thro' the naked tree;
Or frost on hills of Ochiltree

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