it mark out fuch a road of action as that I have been fpeaking of, I fhall prefent my reader with a faithful copy of it; after having first informed him, that the deceafed perfon had in his youth been bred to trade, but finding himself not fo well turned for bufinefs, he had for feveral years laft paft lived altogether upon a moderate annuity. Monday, eight of the clock. I put on my clothes, and walked into the parlour. Nine of the clock ditto.. Tied my knee. ftrings, and washed my hands. Hours ten, eleven and twelve. Smoked three pipes of Virginia. Read the Supplement and Daily Courant. Things go ill in the north. Mr. Nifby's opinion thereupon, One of the clock in the afternoon. Ralph for miflaying my tobacco-box. Chid Two of the clock. Sat down to dinner. Mem. Too many plumbs, and no fuet. From three to four. Took my afternoon's nap. / From four to fix. Wind, S. S. E. From fix to ten. At the club. Mr. Nifby's opinion about the peace. Walked into the fields. Ten of the clock. Went to bed, flept found. Tuesday, being holiday, eight of the clock. Rofe as ufual. Nine of the clock, Wafhed hands and face, fhaved, put on my double-foaled shoes. Ten, eleven, twelve. Took a walk to If lington, One. Took a pot of Mother Cob's mild. Between two and three. Returned, dined on a knuckle of veal and bacon. Mem. Sprouts wanting. Two. Dined as ufual. Stomach good, Three. Nap broke by the falling of a pewter difh. Mem. Cook-maid in love and grown careless. From four to fix. Coffee-house. Read the news. A difh of twist. Grand Vifier ftrangled. . From fix to ten. At the club. Mr. Nifby's account of the great Turk. Ten. Dream of the Grand Vifier. Broken deep. Two. Nap broke by the falling of a pewter dish. Mem, Cook-maid in love, and grown careless. From four to fix. At the coffee-houfe. Advice from Smyrna, that the Grand Vifier was first of all strangled, and afterwards beheaded. Six of the clock in the evening. Was half an hour in the club before any body elfe came. Mr. Niby of opinion that the Grand Vifier was not ftrangled the fixth inftant. Ten at night. Went to bed. Slept without waking until nine next morning. Thursday, nine of the clock. Staid within until two of the clock for Sir Timothy; who did not bring me my annuity according to his promise. Two in the afternoon. Sat down to dinner. Lofs of appetite. Small-beer four. Beef overcorned. Three. Could not take my nap. Four and five. Gave Ralph a box on the ear. Turned off my cook-maid. Sent a merfenger to Sir Timothy. Mem. I did not go to the club to-night. Went to bed at nine o'clock. Friday. Paffed the morning in meditation upon Sir Timothy, who was with me a quarter before twelve. Twelve of the clock Bought a new head to my cane, and a tongue to my buckle, Drank a glafs of purl to recover appetite. Two and three. Dined and flept well. From four to fix. Went to the coffee-house. Met Mr. Niby there. Smoked feveral pipes. Mr. Niby of opinion that laced coffee is bad for the head. Six of the clock. At the club as fteward. Sat late. Twelve of the clock. Went to bed, dreamt that I drank small-beer with the Grand Vifier. Saturday. Waked at eleven, walked in the fields, wind N. E. Twelve. Caught in a fhower. One in the afternoon. Returned home and dried myself. Two. Mr. Niby dined with me. Firft courfe, marrow-bones; fecond, ox-cheek, with a bottle of Brooks and Hellier. Three of the clock. Overflept myself. Six. Went to the club. Like to have fallen into a gutter. Grand Vifier certainly dead, &c. I question not but the reader will be furprifed to find the above-mentioned journalist taking fo much care of a life that was filled with fuch inconfiderable actions, and received look into the behaviour of many whom we fo very fmall improvements; and yet, if we daily converfe with, we fhall find that most of their hours are taken up in thofe three important articles of eating, drinking, and fleeping. I do not suppose that a man lofes his time, who is not engaged in public affairs, or in an illustrious courfe of action. On the contrary, I believe our hours may very often be more profita. bly laid out in fuch tranfactions as make no fi gure in the world, than in fuch as are apt to draw upon them the attention of mankind. One may become wifer and better by feveral me. thods of employing one's felf in fecrecy and filence, and do what is laudable without noise or oftentation. I would, however, recommend to every one of my readers, the keeping a journal of their lives for one week, and fetting down punctually their whole series of employments during that fpace of time. This kind of felfexamination would give them, a true flate of themfelves, and incline them to confider feri. oufly what they are about, One day would rectify the omiffions of another, and make a man weigh all thofe indifferent actions, which, though they are easily forgotten, must certainly be accounted for, excel. • Mr. Spectators Certain vice which you have lately at A tacked, has not yet been confidered by you as growing fo deep in the heart of man, that the affectation out-lives the practice of it. You must have obferved that men who have been bred in arms preferve to the most extreme and feeble old-age a certain daring in ⚫ their afpect: in like manner, they who have paffed their time in gallantry and adventure, keep up, as well as they can, the appearance of it, and carry a petulant inclination to their laft moments. Let this ferve for a preface to a relation I am going to give you of an old beau in town, that has not only been amo· rous, and a follower of women in general, but alfo, in fpite of the admonition of gray hairs, been from his fixty-third year to his prefent · feventieth, in an actual purfuit of a young lady, the wife of his friend, and a man of merit. The gay old Efcalus has wit, good health, and is perfectly well-bred'; but from the fashion and manners of the court when he was in his bloom, has such a natural tendency to amorous adventure, that he thought it would be an endless reproach to him to make no ufe of a familiarity he was allowed at a gentleman's houfe, whofe good-humour and 'confidence expofed his wife to the addreffes of any who should take it in their head to do him the good office. It is not impoffible that Efcalus might alfo refent that the hufband was ⚫ particularly negligent of him; and though he gave many intimations of a paffion towards the wife, the hufband either did not fee them, or put him to the contempt of overlooking them. In the mean time Ifabella, for fo we fhall call our heroine, faw his paffion, and rejoiced in it as a foundation for much diverfion, and an opportunity of indulging herself in the dear delight of being admired, ad'dreffed to, and flattered, with no ill confequence to her reputation. This lady is of a free and difengaged behaviour, ever in good•humour, fuch as is the image of innocence ⚫ with thofe who are innocent, and an encouragement to vice with thofe who are abandoned. From this kind of carriage, and an apparent approbation of his gallantry, Eicalus had frequent opportunities of laying amorous epiftles in her way; of fixing his eyes attentively upon her action, of performing a thoufand little offices which are neglected by the unconcerned, but are fo many approaches to⚫wards happiness with the enamoured. It was now, as is above hinted, almoft the end of the feventh year of his paffion, when Efcalus from general terms, and the ambiguous refpe&t which criminal lovers retain in their addreffes, began to bewail that his paffion grew too violent for him to anfwer any longer for his be haviour towards her; and that he hoped the would have confideration for his long and patient refpect, to excufe the motions of a 66 heart now no longer under the direction of the unhappy owner of it. Such for fome months had been the language of Efcalus, both in his talk and his letters to Ifabella; who returned ⚫ all the profufion of kind things which had been the collection of fifty years with "I must not "hear you; you will make me forget that you are a gentleman; I would not willingly lofe you as a friend;" and the like expreffions, which the fkilful interpret to their own advantage, as well knowing that a feeble denial is a modeft affent. I fhould have told you, that Ifabella, during the whole progrefs of this amour, communicated it to her husband; and that an account of Efcalus's love was their ufual entertainment after half a day's absence: Ifabella therefore, upon her lover's late more " open affaults, with a fmile told her husband he could hold out no longer, but that his fate 'was now come to a crifis. After the had ex plained herself a little farther, with her hufband's approbation fhe proceeded in the fol 'lowing manner. The next time that Efcalus was alone with her, and 'repeated his impor tunity, the crafty Ifabella looked on her fan with an air of great attention, as confidering of what importance fuch a fecret was to her; and upon the repetition of a warm expreffion, fhe looked at him with an eye of fondnefs, and told him he was paft that time of life, 'which could make her fear he would boast of a.. lady's favour; then turned away her head, 'with a very well acted confufion, which fa'voured the escape of the aged Efcalus. This adventure was matter of great pleafantry to Ifabella and her fpoufe; and they had enjoyed it two days before Efcalus could recollect him 'felf enough to form the following letter. 66 66 "Madam, W HAT happened the other day, gives me a lively image of the inconfiftence "of human paffions and inclinations. We pur "fue what we are denied, and place, our affec tions on what is abfent, though we neglected "it when prefent. As long as you refused my "love, your refufal did fo ftrongly excite my "paffion, that I had not once the leifure to "think of recalling my reafon to aid me against "the defign upon your virtue. But when that "virtue began to comply in my favour, my rea→ "fon made an effort over my love, and let me "fee the balenefs of my behaviour in attempt "ing a woman of honour. I own to you, it "was not without the most violent struggle, "that I gained this victory over myfelf; nay, I will confefs my fhame, and acknowledge I "could not have prevailed but by flight. How ever, Madam, I beg that you will believe a "moment's weakness has not destroyed the ef"teem I had for you, which was confirmed by "fo many years of obftinate virtue. You have "reafon to rejoice that this did not happen within the obfervation of one of the young "fellows, who would have exposed your weak"nefs, and gloried in his own brutish inclina❝tions. "I am, Madam, Your mest devoted humble fervant." Ifabellay 66 Ifabella, with the help of her husband, re- various cocks of their hats, all flatter us in this turned the following answer. opinion. "SIR," I Cannot but account myself a very happy woman, in having a man for a lover that 66 can write fo well, and give fo good a turn to 661 a difappointment. Another excellence you have above all other pretenders I ever heard of, on occafions where the most reasonable men lofe" all their reafon, you have your's moft powerful. We have each of us to thank our genius that the paffion of one abated in proportion as that of the other grew violent. "Does it not yet come into your head, to ima 661 gine that I knew my compliance was the greateft cruelty I could be guilty of towards 66 you? In return for your long and faithful paflion, I must let you know that you are old enough to become a little more gravity; but "if you will leave me and coquet it any where elfe, may your mistress yield! 66 T "Ifabella" N° 319 THURSDAY, MARCH 6. ་ ་ ་་་་ Have endeavoured in the courfe of my papers to do justice to the age, and have taken care as much as poffible to keep myself a neuter between both fexes. I have neither fpared the ladies out of complaifance, nor the men out of partiality; but notwithstanding the great integrity with which I have acted in this particular, I find myself taxed with an inclination to favour my own half of the fpecies. Whether it be that the women afford a more fruitful field for fpeculation, or whether they run more in my head than the men, I cannot tell, but I fhall iet down the charge as it is laid against me in the following letter I Mr. Spectator. Always make one among a company of young females, who perufe your fpeculations every morning. I am at prefent commiffioned by our whole affembly, to let you know, that we fear you are a little inclined to be partial towards your own sex. We must however acknowledge, with all due gratitude, that in fome cafes you have given us our re⚫venge on the men, and done us juftice. We could not eafily have forgiven you feveral ftrokes in the diffection of the coquette's heart, if you had not much about the fame time made a facrifice to us of a beau's fcull. You may further, Sir, please to remember, that not long fince you attacked our hoods and ⚫ commodes in fuch manner, as, to ufe your ' own expreffion, made very many of us afhamed to fhew our heads. We muft, therefore, beg leave to reprefent to you, that we are in hopes, if you would please to make a due inquiry, the men in all ages would be found to have been little lefs whimsical in adorning that part, than ourfelves. The dif⚫ferent forms of their wigs, together with the I had an humble fervant last fummer, who the first time he declared himself, was in a full-bottomed wig; but the day after, to my no fmall furprife, he accofted me in a thin natural one. I received him at this our fecond interview, as a perfect ftranger, but was extremely confounded, when his fpeech difcovered who he was. I refolved, therefore, to fix his face in my memory for the future; but as I was walking in the Park the fame evening, he appeared to me in one of thofe wigs that I think you call a night-cap, which had altered him more effectually than before. He afterwards played a couple of black riding wigs upon me with the fame fuccefs; and in short, affumed a new face, almost every day in the first month of his courtship. I obferved afterwards, that the variety of cocks into which he moulded his hat, had not a little contributed to his impofitions upon me. 'Yet as if all these ways were not sufficient to diftinguish their heads, you must doubtless, Sir, have obferved, that great numbers of young fellows have, for feveral months laft paft, taken upon them to wear feathers. We hope, therefore, that thefe may, with 6 as much justice, be called Indian princes, as you have stiled a woman in a coloured hood an Indian queen; and that you will, in due time, take these airy gentlemen into confidera⚫tion. We the more earnestly beg that you would put a stop to this practice, fince it has already 'loft us one of the most agreeable members of 'our fociety, who after having refused several good eftates, and two titles, was lured from us last week by a mixed feather. I am ordered to prefent you the refpects of our whole company, and am, Sir, Your very humble fervant, • Dorinda. SIR, Prefume I need not inform you, that among men of drefs it is a common phrafe to fay, Mr. Such-a-one" has, ftruck a bold ftroke;" by which we understand, that he is the first man who has had courage enough to lead up a fashion. Accordingly, when our tailors take measure of us, they always de"mand "whether we will have a plain fuit, or ftrike a bold ftroke." I think I may without vanity fay, that I have ftruck fome of the boldest and most fuccefsful ftrokes of any man in Great-Britain. I was the firft that truck the long pocket about two years fince; I was likewife the author of the frofted button, which when I faw the town come readily into, being refolved to ftrike while the iron was hot, I produced much about the fame time the fcal Slop lop Aap, the knotted cravat, and made a fair push for the filver-clocked stocking. A few months after I brought up the modif jacket, or the coat with clofe fleeves. I ftruck this at firft in a plain Doily; but that failing I • ftruck it a fecond time in blue camblet; and repeated the ftroke in feveral kinds of cloth, until at last it took effect. There are two or three young fellows at the other end of the town, who have always their eye upon me, and answer me ftroke for ftroke. I was once fo unwary as to mention my fancy in relation to a new-fashioned furtout before one of these gentlemen, who was difingenuous enough to fteal my thought, and by that means prevented my intended stroke. * I have a design this fpring to make very con⚫ fiderable innovations in the waistcoat; and have already begun with a coup d'effai upon the fleeves, which has fucceeded very well. I muft further inform you, if you will promise to encourage, or at least connive at me, that it is my design to ftrike fuch a stroke the beginning of the next month, as shail furprise the whole town. I do not think it prudent to acquaint you with all the particulars of my intended drefs; but will only tell you as a fample of it, that I hall very speedily appcar at White's in a cherry-coloured hat. I took this hint from the ladies hoods, which I look upon as the boldest stroke that fex has ftruck for thefe < hundred years last past. 'I am, Sir, Your moft obedient, Will Sprightly." Mr. Stefator, Y CROXAL OU have given many hints in your papers to the difadvantage of perfons of your own fex, who lay plots upon women. Among other hard words you have published the term male-coquets, and been very fevere upon fuch as give themselves the liberty of a little dalliance of heart, and playing faft and loofe, between love and indifference, until perhaps an easy young girl is reduced to fighs, dreams, and tears; and languishes away her life for a carelefs coxcomb, who looks aftonished, and wonders' at fuch an effect from what in him was all but common civility. Thus you have treated the men who were irrefolute în marriage; but if you defign to be impartial, pray be so honeft as to print the in'formation I now give you, of a certain set of women who never coquet for the matter, but with an high hand marry whom they please to whom they pleafe. As for my part, I should not have concerned myself with them, but that I understand I am pitched upon, by them to be married, against my will, to one I never faw in my life. It has been my misfortune, Sir very innocently, to rejoice in a plentiful for tune, of which I am mafter, to bespeak a fine chariot, to give direction for two or three handsome snuff-boxes, and as many fuits of fine clothes; but before any of thefe were ready, I heard reports of my being to be married to two or three different young women, Upon my taking notice of it to a young gentleman who is often in my company, he told me finiling, I was in the inquifition. You may believe I was not a little ftartled at what he meant, and more fo when he asked me if I had bespoke any thing of late that was fine, I told him feveral; upon which he produced a defcription of my perfon, from the tradef' men whom I had employed, and told me that they had certainly informed against me. Mr. Spectator, Whatever the world may think of me, I am more coxcomb than fool, and I grew very inquifitive upon this head, not a little pleafed with the novelty. My friend told me, there were a certain fet of women of fashion, whereof the number of fix made a committee, who fat thrice a week, under the title of the inquifition on maids and bachelors. It seems, whenever there comes fuch an un, thinking gay thing as myfelf to town, he must want all manner of neceffaries, or be put into the inquifition by the first tradefman he em6 ploys. They have conftant intelligence with cane-fhops, perfumers, toymen, coach-makers, and china-houfes. From thefe feveral places these undertakers for marriages have as conftant and regular correfpondence, as the funerai-men have with vintners and apothecaries. All bachelors are under their immediate infpection, and my friend produced to me a report given into their board, wherein an old uncle of mine who came to town with me, and myfelf, where inferted, and we ftood thus; the uncle fmoky, rotten, poor; the nephew raw, but no fool, found at prefent, very rich. My information did not end here, but my friend's advices are fo good, that he 'could fhew me a copy of the letter fent to the young lady who is to have me, which I in clofe to you. him, and that the wrong one; for the lady commiffioners have devoted him to another than the perfon against whom they have employed their agent his friend to alarm him. The plot is laid fo well about this young gentleman, that he, has no friend to retire to, no place to appear in, or part of the kingdom to fly into, but he muft fall into the notice, and be fubject to the power of the inquifition. They have their emiffaries and fubftitutes in all parts of this united kingdom. The first step they ufually take, is to find from a correfpondence, by their meffengers and whifperers, with fome domeftic of the bachelor, who is to be hunted into the toils they have laid for him, what are his manners, his familiarities, his good qualities or vices; not as the good in him is a recommendation, or the ill a diminution, but as they affect or contribute to the main inquiry, What eftate he has in him? When this point is well reported to the board, they can take in a wild roaring fox-hunter, as eafily as a foft, gentle young fop of the town. The way is to make all places uneafy to him, but the fcenes in which they have allotted him to act. His brother huntímen, bottle-companions, his fraternity of fops, fhall be brought into the confpiracy against him. Then this matter is not laid in fo barefaced a manner before him as to have it intimated, Mrs. Such-a one would make him a very proper wife; but by the force of their correfpondence they fhall make it, as Mr. Waller faid of the marriage of the dwarfs, as impracticable to have any woman befides her they defign him, as it would have been in Adam to have refufed Eve. The man named by the commiflion for Mrs. Such-a-one, fhall neither be in fashion, nor dare ever to appear in company, fhould he attempt to evade their determination. things for which he has no tafte. But notwithstanding all this, and what elfe he may defend himfelf with, as that the lady is too old or too young, of a fuitable humour, or the quite contrary, and that it is impoffible they can ever do other than wrangle from June to January, every body tells him all this is fpleen, and he must have a wife; while all the members of the inquifition are unanimous in a certain woman for him, and they think they all together are better able to judge, than he or any other private perfon whatsoever. The female fex wholly govern domeftic life; and by this means, when they think fit, they can fow diffenfions between the dearest friends, nay make father and fon irreconcileable enemies in spite of all the ties of gratitude on one part, and the duty of protection to be paid on the other. The ladies of the inquifition underftand this perfectly well; and where love is not a motive to a man's choofing one whom they allot, they 'can with very much art, infinuate ftories to the difadvantage of his honefty or courage, until the creature is too much difpirited to bear up against a general ill reception, which he every where. meets with, and in due time falls into their appointed wedlock for fhelter. I have a long letter bearing date the fourth inftant, which gives me a large account of the policies of this court; and find there is now before them a very refractory perfon, who has escaped all their machina tions for two years laft paft: but they have prevented two fucceffive matches which were of his own inclination, the one by a report that his mistress was to be married, and the very day appointed, wedding-clothes bought, and all things ready for her being given to another; the fecond time by infinuating to all his miftrefs's friends and acquaintance, that he had been falfe to feveral other women, and the like. The poor man is now reduced to profefs he defigns to lead a fingle life; but the inquifition give out to all his acquaintance, that nothing is intended but the gentleman's own welfare and happinefs. When this is urged, he talks ftill more humbly, and protests he aims only at a life without pain or reproach; pleasure, honour, and riches, are SIR, Yo Temple, March 3, 1711.. OUR fpeculation this day on the subject of idleness has employed me, ever fince I read it, in forrowful reflexions on my having loitered away the term, or rather the vacation, of ten years in this place, and unhappily fuffered a good chamber and ftudy to lie idle as long. My books, except thofe I have taken < to fleep upon, have been totally neglected, and my Lord Coke and other venerable authors were never fo flighted in their lives. I fpend 'moft of the day at a neighbouring coffee-houfe, where we have what I may call a lazy club. We generally come in night-gowns, with our ftockings about our heels, and fometimes but one on. Our falutation at entrance is a yawn and a stretch, and then without more ceremony we take our place at the lolling-table, where our difcourfe is, what I fear you would not read out, therefore fhall not infert. But I affure you, Sir, I heartily lament this lofs of time, and am now refolved, if poffible, with double diligence, to retrieve it, being effec tually awakened by the arguments of Mr. Slack out of the fenfelefs ftupidity that has fo long poffeffed me. And to demonftrate that 'penitence accompanies my confeffion, and con'ftancy my refolutions, I have locked my door for a year, and defire you would let my com'panions know I am not within. I am with great repect, T Sir, your moft obcdient fervant, N. B.. No 321, SATURDAY, MARCH 8, Nec fatis eft pulchra effe poemata, dulc'a funto. Hor. Ars Poet. ver. 99. 'Tis not enough a poem's finely writ; It must affect and captivate the foul. ROSCOMMON. HOSE, who know how many volumes have been written on the poems of Homer and Virgil, will eafily pardon the length of my difcourfe upon Milton. The Paradife Loft is looked upon by the best judges, as the greatest production, or at least the nobleft work of genius in our language, and therefore deferves to be fet before an English reader in its full beauty. For this reafon, though I have endeavoured to give a general idea of its graces and imperfections in my fix first papers, I thought myself obliged to beftow one upon every book in particular. The first three books I have already difpatched, and am now entering upon the fourth. I need not acquaint my reader that there are multitudes of beauties in this great author, especially in the 3 G defcriptive |