VARIETY.

ORIGINAL AND SELECTED

For the Lady's Miscellany.

WILL HONNEYCOMB diverted us last night with an account of a young fellow's first discovering his mistress. The young lady was one, it seems, who had long before conceived a favorable opinion of him and was still in hopes he Iwould some time or other make his advances. As he was on e day talking with her in company of her two sisters, the conversation happened to turn on love. Each of the young ladies, by way of rallery was recommending a wife to him, when, to the no small surprise of her who languished for him in secret, he told them with a more than ordinary seriousness, that his heart had been long enga ged to one whose name he thought himself obliged in honor to con ceal, but that he could shew her picture in the lid of his snuff-box. The young lady, who found herself mo st sensibly touched by this confession, took the first opportu nity that presented, of snatching his box out of his hand. He seemed desirous of recovering it, but finding her resolved to look into the did, begged her that, if she should happen to know the p pers sou, she would not reveal the name. Upon carrying it to the window, she was very argeeably surprised to find that their was no

thing within the lid but a little looking-glass, in which after she viewed her own face with more pleasure than ever she had done before, she returned the box with a smile, telling him, she could not but admire his choice. Omnia viceit amor. Spectator.

The name of a public functionary at the Hague a few years since was Mynheer De Voos Van Steenwyk Tot Don Hoggenhoff. The minister who should negocitate with him ought to know the use of pronouns.

[As a match for the hunting name of the Hague mean, there is a Duch milkman, now living on the Ridge Road, about three miles from this city, whose name we understand to be John Romes Rim. per Von Wretchel Rigingaug.]

Phil. paper.

A dragoon was shot in Dublin for desertion, and taking away his horse and acoutrements at the same. When on trial an officer asked him what could induce him, to take his horse away? To which he replied, he ran away with him.

And what (said the officer) did you do with the money you sold him for? That (replied the fellow with the utmost idniference) ran away too?"

In the Limerick paper an Irish gentleman, whose wife had absconded from him, thus cautions the puplic against trusting her:

My wife has eloped from me without rhyme or reason, and I desire no one will trust her on my account for I am not married to her.

Epitaph on a puritanical locksmith. A zealous locksmith died of late, And did arrive at heaven's gate; He stood without and would not knock, Because he meant to pick the lock. HEYWOOD, the epigrammatist, being asked by Queen MARY what wind blew him to court; answered her, Two winds, The one to see your Majesty-" "We thank you for that, (said the Queen) and what is the other? That your Majesty might see me."

ELEGANT AND MORAL.

A wicked sou! is the greatest object of compassion in the world. The many bitter reflections which a bad action costs a mind, in which there is any remains of goodness, cannot be compensated by the highest pleasure which such an action can produce.

Many an innocent person hath owed their ruin to this circumstance alone: that the degree of villainy was such as must have exceeded the faith of every man who was not himself a villain.

The house of a clergyman, in the vicinity of Islington, was lately broken open and plundered. The robbers, on taking leave, wrote on a piece of paper which lay on a desk-"watch as well as pray."

Swindling

-On Saturday, as Mr. Jameson, of walco-place, was passing over Westminster-bridge, he was accosted by a person in the dress of a clergyman, who said he was suddenly taken ill, and requested permission to lean on Mr. Jameson's arm for support across the bridge, or till he should meet with a coach. Mr. Jameson rea

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dily consented, and walked with the supposed invalid till nearly opposite Astley's theatre, and he hailed an empty coach. Mr. Jarneson assisted the stranger into it, and received his acknowledgements for the aid he had afforded him, along with his card, on which was written, "The Rev. Mr. Bowen, Trafalgar place, Newington." The coach then drove off, and Mr. Jameson soon after discovered, that during their walk the Rev. Mr. Bowen had contrived to ease him of his purse, his watch, and his pocket-handkerchief. It is almost needless to say, the card of add. ess was fictitious. London pap.

themselves, he thought to come in for his share in the dividend, and entering the chamber,employed himself very busily to see what was left for him; and finding nothing but the cardinal's cap, he clapped it on his head, and frisked up and down, as etremely pleased with his new promotion; at which the expiring cardinal fell into a very vehement fit of laughter, which broke the quinsey in his throat, and having discharged it by vomiting, recovered his health, and after that his stolen goods.

LADY'S MISCELLANY.
NEW-YORK, October 12, 1811.

"Be it our task, To note the passing tidings of the time

The City Inspector reports the death of 52 persons in this city and suburbs during the last week, ending on the 5th inst

Providential preservation.-A person ately arrived in this country from Europe, who is subject to occasional fits of in. sanity, being left by his attendants for a few moments was found on their return to have escaped from the apartment in which he had been secured. It appears that as soon as he was alone he made his way out of the garret window when pro seeding along the gutter to the adjoining house the roof of which has a considerable assent, he drept himself down the chimney. Having sustained no bodily injury in this sooty descent, he walked very deliberately across the room in which he had landed, he went to the win, dow, and threw himself out into the yard a descent of about twenty feet, when run. ing into the strect was taken by his friends and found unhurt.

[Vermont Rep.

A man named John Canaday. was on Tuesday last drowned near Castle Wil. liams by the upsetting of a boat, in which were three persons. The survivers were Picked up by a boat from Whitehall ship.

The fever at Amboy has subsided and the Mayor's preclamation of interdiction with that place and this city is rescinded.

FIRE.

Boston, Oct. 7. The house and out houses belonging to Mr. Joseph Bennett, of Groton Mass. were consumed by fire. on Thursday mor ning last. about one o'clock, together with all his furniture and farming utensils. An infant child of Mr. B was burnt to death and Mrs. B. with her other children nar rowly escaped. Mr. B. being absent.

A Young Thief!-On Sunday last, two ladies passing up Broadway, were robbed of their workbags, which were suspen ded from their arms, by a boy of about *10 or 12 years of age; he very dextrously cut the strings with a knife, put the bags in his hat and made off. In passing through Catharine Lane, an Irish lad attempted to stop him, upon which the young villain threatened to stab him with the knife which he still had in his

hand; but the son of St. Patrick, unmindful of his weapon, made a blow at him which knocked off his hat, in which were found one of the bags, with the en. 'tire contents, consisting of $15 in cash, and various other articles. Some of the articles belonging to the other bag which he had stolen a few hours before were also in his hat, but the money, amount> ing to about $6, was missing-The || Police Officers have been informed of the fact, and will, no doubt, adopt, the necessary measures to put a stop to his further depredations.-Mer. Adv.

On the 6th inst. by the rev Mr Harts in the Episcopal Church, at Hempstead, Mr. John B. Coles, Jun. of the city of New York, merchant, to Miss Eliza T Coles, daughter of General Coles, of Do. soris Long Island.

At Albany on Monday evening last, by the rev. Mr. Clowes, Mr. Stephen Storm, merchant of this city to Miss Jane Maria Graham, daughter of J. V. W. Graham, esq. of the former place.

At Troy on Thursday the 3d inst. Mr. Henry Vail, merchant to Miss Eliza Selden, daughter of Charles Selden, esq.

Died.

On the 7th inst. after a short illnes Miss Susan Seaman, youngest daughter of Mrs. Elizebeth Seaman of this city

On Wednesday last, at Flat-Bush, Long. Island, Mrs. Margaret Bergen, wife of John Bergen.

At Savannah, in the 29th year of his age, Mr. James Stewart, Silver Smith a native af Scotland.

At Tudor Place. the seat of Thomas Peter, esq. near George Town, Mrs El eanor Stuart, consort of David Stuart. esq. of Osian Hall, in the county of Fairfax-in the 56th year of her age.

On Saturday evening last, after a short distressing illness, Mr. Francis Sage, sen. formerly of Middletown, Conn.

On Tuesday morning last, of a linger. ing illness, Mr. John Fouston

On the 7th inst. at the Passaic Falls, New Jersey, Gen. Richard Dey, aged 59 years.

At New Orleans on the 25th Ang last, of the fever. Mr. James B. Wall, of Trenton. N. J.

At Baltimore, Andrew Buchanan, esq. late merchant.

At New Orleans, Dr. William Upshaw, late Surgeon of the 5th regiment of infantry; Lieut. Francis Thornton, of the ma rine corps; Robert Alexander, architect, Levi Boone Wilcox, printer.

At Albany on the 30th ult. in conse. quence of her clothes having accidentally. taken fire from a candle Miss Elizabeth Cooper, daughter of Richard F. Cooper, esq of Cooperstown.

Apallo struck the enchanting Lyre, The Muses sung in strains alternate."

For the Lady's Miscellany.

MY ABSENT LOVE' How mournful I felt when I parted, and left

The girl I love true, and admire;
But tho' absent, shall Fofhope be bereft,
Why should cheering sweet hope expire?
Yes mournful I felt when I bade her
adieu,

And smother'd the tear of regret;
But should ever again my fond eyes re.
1. view

Her charms, I'd that sorrow forget.

Enstamp't on my heart, her sweet im. mage remains,

In fancy, I press to my breast

The fair maid, who alone my vows had obtain'd

And that fancy, lulls me to rest.

Our hearts are united by sympathy's ord,

T' be broken by no earthly foe; Love and friendship bring with them their own reward;

Fond wish,' to my loveaway go.

And tell her my steps shall be guided, and led

By two graces, true lovers esteem; Perseverance and constancy, place on the head,

The laurels of triumph, fresh, green.

And let not her peace suffer loss.

And should the great king, whom his creatures obey,

But grant me my most anxious hope,' The time will soon come, when I'll fol low thy way,

With my arm her sweet form to prop. Haste away! and soon find access to her heart,

Tell her, mine beats alone but for her ; While in absence, it beats and flutters in smart,

It Butters, but not in Despair.

M.

THE SAVOYARD's RETURN.

BY HENRY KIRKE WHITE.

Oh! yonder is the well known spot,

My dear, my long-lost native home! Oh! welcome is yon little cof,

Where I shall rest, no more to roam! Oh! I have travell'd far and wide,

O'er many a distant foreign land Each place, each province I have tried,

And sung and danc'd my saraband. But all their charms could not prevail, To steal my heart from yonder vale. Of distant climes, the false report,

It lur'd me from my native land; It bade me reve-my sole support My cymbals and my saraband. The woody dell, the hanging rock,

The chamoisskipping o'er the heights; The plain adorn'd with many a flock,

And, oh! a thousand more delights, That grace yon dear belov'd retreat, Have backward won my weary feet. Now safe return'd with wandering tired,

No more my little home 14 leave;
And many a tale of what I've seen

Shall while a
e away the winter's eve:'
Oh! I have wander'd far and wide
O'er mapy a distant foreign lands