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master's is so heady, that a pint of it oversets a claret drinker. Come, now my dear!
Cham. Don't be rude! bless me!-I shall be ruined -what will become of me?
Brush. I'll take care of you, by all that's honourable.
Cham. You are a base man to use me so I'll cry out, if you don't let me go. That is Miss Sterling's chamber, that Miss Fanny's, and that Madam Heidelberg's.
Brush. We know all that. And that Lord Ogleby's, and that my Lady What-d'ye-call-'em: I don't mind such folks when I'm sober, much less when I am whim. sical-rather above that, too.
Cham. More shame for you, Mr. Brush !-you terrify me-you have no modesty.
Brush. O, but I have, my sweet spider-brusher-for instance, I reverence Miss Fanny—she's a most deli. cious morsel, and fit for a prince. With all my horrors of matrimony, I could marry her myself but for her sister
Miss Sterl. There, there, madam, all in a story! Cham. Bless me, Mr. Brush !-I heard something!
Brush. Rats, I suppose, that are gnawing the old timbers of this execrable old dungeon-If it was mine, I would pull it down, and fill your fine canal up with the rubbish; and then I should get rid of two don'd things at once.
Chan. Law! law! how you blaspheme !we shall have the house upon our heads for it.
Brush. No, no, it will last our time-but, as I was saying, the eldest sister-Miss Jezebel
. Cham. Is a fine young lady, for all your evil tongue.
Brusk. No-we have smoked her already; and unless she marries our old Swiss, she can have none of us. -No, no, she won't do we are a little too nice.
Cham. You're a monstrous rake, Mr. Brush, and don't care what you say.
Brush, Why, for that matter, my dear, I am a little inclined to mischief; and if you don't have pity upon me, I will break open that door, and ravish Mrs. Hei. delberg
Mrs. Heidel. (Coming forward.] There's no bearing this-you profligate monster!
Cham. Ha! I am undone!
[Runs off. Miss Sterl. A fine discourse you have had with that fellow!
Mrs. Heidel. And a fine time of night it is to be here with that drunken monster!
Miss Sterl. What have you to say for yourself?
Cham. I can say nothing—I'm so frightened, and so ashamed.-But indeed I am vartuous--I am vartuous, indeed.
Mrs. Heidel. Well, well-don't tremble so; but tell us what you know of this horrable plot here.
Miss Sterl. We'll forgive you, if you'll discover all.
Cham. Why, madam-don't let me betray my fellow-servants—I sha'n't sleep in my bed, if I do.
Mrs. Heidel. Then you shall sleep somewhere else to-morrow night.
Cham. O dear! what shall I do?
Mrs. Heidel. Tell us this moment, or I'll turn you out of doors directly.
Cham. Why, our butler has been treating us below in his pantry-Mr. Brush forced us to make a kind of a holiday night of it.
Miss Sterl. Holiday! for what?
Cham. Because, as how, madam, there was a change in the family, they said that his honour, Sir John, was to marry Miss Fanny instead of your ladyship.,
Miss Sterl. And so you make a holiday for that, Very fine!
Cham. I did not make it, ma'am.
Mrs. Heidel. But do you know nothing of Sir John's being to run away with Miss Fanny to-night?
Cham. No, indeed, ma'am. Miss Sterl. Nor of his being now locked up in my sister's chamber?
Cham. No, as I hope for marcy, ma'am. Mrs. Heidel. Well, I'll put an end to all this directly - do you run to my brother Sterling
Chan. Now, ma'am!—'Tis so very latè, ma'am
Mrs. Heidel. I don't care how late it is. Tell him there are thieves in the house—that the house is on fire - tell him to come here immediately-Go, I say.
Cham. I will, I will, though I'm frighten'd out of my wits.
[Exit. Mrs. Heidel. Do you watch here, my dear; and I'll put myself in order to face them. We'll plot 'em, and counter-plot 'em, too.
[Exit into her chamber. Miss Sterl. I have as much pleasure in this revenge, as in being made a countess. Ha ! they are unlocking the door.-Now for it!
[Retires. FANNY's door is unlocked, and Betty comes out; Miss ·
STERLING approaches her. Berty. (Calling within.) Sir! sir!-now's your timeall's clear. [Seeing Miss Sterling.) Stay, stay—not yet - we are watch'd. Miss Sterl. And so you are, madam Betty.
[Miss STERLING lays hold of her, while BETTY
locks the door, and puts the key into her pocket. Betty. [Turning round.) What's the matter, madam?
Miss Sterl. Nay, that you shall tell my father and aunt, madam.
Betty. I am no tell-tale, madam, and no thief; they'll get nothing from me. Miss Sterl. You have a great deal of courage, Betty;
and considering the secrets you have to keep, you have occasion for it.
Betty. My mistress shall never repent her good opi. nion of me, ma'am.
Enter Mr. STERLING. Sterl. What's all this? What's the matter? Why am I disturb’d in this manner?
Miss Sterl. This creature, and my distresses, sir, will explain the matter. . Re-enter Mrs. HeidelbERG, with another head-dress. Mrs. Heidel. Now I'm prepard for the rancounter.
- Well, brother, have you heard of this scene of wickedness?
Sterl. Not I–But what is it? speak. I was got inte my little closet, all the lawyers were in bed, and I had almost lost my senses in the confusion of Lord Ogleby's mortgages, when I was alarmed with a foolish girl, who could hardly speak; and whether it's fire, or thieves, or murder, or a rape, I'm quite in the dark..
Mrs. Heidel. No, no, there's no rape, brother !-all parties are willing, I believe. Miss Sterl. Who's in that chamber?
[Detaining Betty, who seemed to be stealing away. Betty. My mistress. Miss Sterl. And who's with your mistress ? Betty. Why, who should there be ? Miss Sterl. Open the door then, and let us see.
Betty. The door is open, madam. [Miss Sterling goes to the door.] I'll sooner die than peach. [Exit, hastily.
Miss Sterl. The door is lock'd; and she has got the key in her pocket.
Mrs. Heidel. There's impudence, brother! piping hot from your daughter Fanny's school !
Sterl. But, zounds! what is all this about? You tell me of a sum total, and you don't produce the particulars.
Mrs. Heidel. Sir John Melvil is locked up in your daughter's bed-chamber-There is the particular.
Sterl. The devil he is ! That's bad. Miss Sterl. And he has been there some time, too. Sterl. Ditto! Mrs. Heidel. Ditto! worse and worse, I say. I'll raise the house, and expose him to my lord, and the whole fammaly.
Sterl. By no means! we shall expose ourselves, sister! - The best way is to insure privately- let me alone! I'll make him marry her to-morrow morning.
Miss Sterl. Make him marry her! this is beyond all patience !-You have thrown away all you affection, and I shall do as much by my obedience; unnatural fathers make unnatural children. My revenge is in my own power, and I'll indulge it. --Had they made their escape, I should have been exposed to the derision of the world : but the deriders shall be derided; and som Help! help, there !--Thieves ! thieves !
Mrs. Heidel. Tit-for-tat, Betsy! you are right, my girl.
Sterl. Zounds! you'll spoil all-you'll raise the whole family— The devil's in the girl.
Mrs. Heidel. No, no; the devil's in you, brother: I am ashamed of your principles.- What! would you connive at your daughter's being locked up with her sister's husbund? Help! Thieves ! thieves, I say !
[Cries out. Sterl. Sister, I beg you !-daughter, I command you! - If you have no regard for me, consider yourselves ! - we shall lose this opportunity of ennobling our blood, and getting above twenty per cent." for our money.
Miss Sterl. What, by my disgrace and my sister's triumph! I have a spirit above 'such mean considera