Cham. I seldom drinks chocolate; and, if I did, one has no satisfaction with such apprehensions about oneif my lord should wake, or the Swish gentleman should see one, or madam Heidelberg should know of it, I should be frighted to death-besides, I have had my tea already this morning-I'm sure I hear my lord. [In a fright.

Brush. No, no, madam, don't flutter yourself-the moment my lord wakes, he rings his bell, which I answer sooner or later, as it suits my convenience.

Cham. But should he come upon us without ringing

Brush. I'll forgive him if he does-This key [Takes a phial out of the case.] locks him up till I please to let him out.

Cham. Law! sir, that's potecary's stuff.

Brush. It is so-but without this he can no more get out of bed-than he can read without spectacles[Sips.] What with qualms, age, rheumatism, and a few surfeits in his youth, he must have a great deal of brushing, oiling, screwing, and winding-up, to set him a-going for the day.

Cham. [Sips.] That's prodigious indeed-[Sips.] My lord seems quite in a decay.

Brush. Yes, he's quite a spectacle, [Sips.] a mere corpse, till he is reviv'd and refresh'd from our little magazine here-When the restorative pills and cordial waters warm his stomach, and get into his head, vanity frisks in his heart, and then he sets up for the lover, the rake, and the fine gentleman.

Cham. [Sips.] Poor gentleman! but should the Swish gentleman come upon us. [Frightened,

Brush. Why then the English gentleman would be very angry.- No foreigner must break in upon my privacy. [Sips.] But I can assure you Monsieur Canton is otherwise employ'd-He is obliged to skim the cream

of half a score newspapers for my lord's breakfast-ha, ha, ha! Pray, madam, drink your cup peaceably-My lord's chocolate is remarkably good; he won't touch a drop, but what comes from Italy.

Cham. [Sipping.] 'Tis very fine indeed! [Sips.] and charmingly perfum'd-it smells for all the world like our young ladies' dressing-boxes.

Brush. You have an excellent taste, madam; and I must beg of you to accept of a few cakes for your own drinking, [Takes them out of a drawer in the table.] and, in return, I desire nothing but to taste the perfume of your lips. [Kisses her.]—A small return of favours, madam, will make, I hope, this country and retirement agreeable to us both. [He bows, she curtsies.]—Your young ladies are fine girls, faith; [Sips.] though, upon my soul I am quite of my old lord's mind about them; and were I inclin'd to matrimony, I should take the youngest. [Sips. Cham. Miss Fanny! The most affablest, and the most best natur'd creter!

Brush. And the eldest a little haughty or so

Cham. More haughtier and prouder than Saturn himself—but this I say quite confidential to you; for one would not hurt a young lady's marriage, you know. [Sips.

Brush. By no means; but you cannot hurt it with us -we don't consider tempers-we want money, Mrs. Nancy. Give us plenty of that, we'll abate you a great deal in other particulars, ha, ha, ha!

Cham. Bless me, here's somebody!-[Bell rings.]— Oh, 'tis my lord !—Well, your servant, Mr. Brush -I'll clean the cups in the next room.

Brush. Do so-but never mind the bell—I sha'n't go this half hour.-Will you drink tea with me in the afternoon?

Cham. Not for the world, Mr. Brush-I'll be here

to set all things to rights-But I must not drink tea indeed-and so your servant.

[Exit, with tea-board.—Bell rings again. Brush. It is impossible to stupify one's self in the country for a week, without some little flirting with the Abigails;-this is much the handsomest wench in the house, except the old citizen's youngest daughter, and I have not time enough to lay a plan for her.— [Bell rings.] O, my lord[Going. Enter CANTON, with newspapers in his hand. -Maistre Brush!-my

Can. Monsieur Brush!

lor stirra yet?

Brush. He has just rung his bell-I am going to him. [Erit.

Can. Depechez vous donc. [Puts on his spectacles.]— I wish de deveil had all dese papiers-I forget as fast as I read-de Advertise put out of my head de Gazette, de Chronique, and so dey all go l'un aprés l'autre-I must get some nouvelle for my lor, or he'll be enragé contre moi. Voyons! [Reads the paper.] Here is nothing but Anti-Sejanus and advertise

Enter MAID, with chocolate things.

Vat you want, chil?

Maid. Only the chocolate things, sir.

too.

Can. O, ver well-dat is good girl-and very prit [Exit MAID. Lord O. [Within.] Canton! he, he! [Coughs.] Canton !

Can. I come, my!- -vat shall I do?-I have no news-he will make great tintamarre!

Lord O. [Within.] Canton! I say, Canton! Where are you?

Enter LORD OGLEBY, leaning on BRUSH.

Can. Here, my lor!-I ask pardon, my lor, I have not finish de papiers.

Lord O. D-n your pardon, and your papiers-I want you here, Canton.

Can. Den I run, dat is all.

[Shuffles along. LORD OGLEBY leans upon CANTON too, and comes forward.

Lord 0. You Swiss are the most unaccountable mixure-you have the language and the impertinence of the French, with the laziness of Dutchmen.

Can. 'Tis very true, my lor-I can't help-
Lord 0. [Cries out.] O Diavolo!

Can. You are not in pain, I hope, my lor.

Lord O. Indeed but I am, my lor.-That vulgar fellow, Sterling, with his city politeness, would force me down his slope last night to see a clay-coloured ditch, which he calls a canal; and what with the dew, and the east wind, my hips and shoulders are absolutely screw'd to my body.

Can. A littel veritable eau d'arquibusade vil set all to right

[LORD OGLEBY sits down, and BRUSH gives
chocolate.

I ord O. Where are the palsy drops, Brush?
Brush. Here, my lord!

[Pouring out. Lord O. Quelle nouvelle avez vous, Canton ? Can. A great deal of papier, but no news at all. Lord O. What! nothing at all, you stupid fellow? Can. Oui, my lor, I have little advertise here vil give you more plaisir den all de lies about nothing at all. La viola! [Puts on his spectacles. Lord O. Come, read it, Canton, with good emphasis, and good discretion.

Can. I vil, my lor. [CANTON reads.] Dere is no question, but that the Cosmetique Royale vil utterly take away all heats, pimps, frecks, oder eruptions of de skin, and likewise de wrinque of old age, &c. &c.—A great deal more, my lor.-Ee sure to ask for de Cosmetique Royale, signed by the Docteur own hand- Dere is more

raison for dis caution dan good men vil tink.-Eh bien, my lor.

Lord O. Eh bien, Canton !-Will you purchase any? lor?

Can. For you, my

Lord O. For me, you old puppy! for what?

Can. My lor!

Lord O. Do I want cosmetics?

Can. My lor!

Lord O. Look in my face-come, be sincere.Does it want the assistance of art?

Can. [With his spectacles.] En verité non-'Tis very smoose and brillian- but tote dat you might take a

little by way of prevention.

Lord 0. You thought like an old fool, monsieur, as you generally do. The surfeit water, Brush! [BRUSH pours out.]-What do you think, Brush, of this family we are going to be connected with?

Eh!

Brush. Very well to marry in, my lord; but it would never do to live with.

Lord O. You are right, Brush-There is no washing the blackmoor white-Mr. Sterling will never get rid of Blackfriars—always taste of the Borachio

-and the poor woman, his sister, is so busy, and so notable, to make one welcome, that I have not yet got over the fatigue of her first reception; it almost amounted to suffocation!I think the daughters are tolerable -Where's my cephalic snuff?

[BRUSH gives him a box. Can. Dey tink so of you, my lor, for dey look at no ting else, ma foi.

The youngest is delectable.

Lord 0. Did they? Why, I think they did a little -Where's my glass?—[BRUSH puts one on the table.] [Takes snuff. Can. O oui, my lor, very delect, inteed; she made doux yeux at you, my

lor.

Lord O. She was particular.-The eldest, my